Just in time for Spook Retorts, Danielle finishes her recap of Sweet Valley High by Francine Pascal, which also introduces our new Spook Retorts Theme: UK not OK. Did you ever think “I wish Danielle would do more of the Wakefield twins but with werewolves?” Sam didn’t, but you’re in luck! We left off finding out Lord Pembroke was deep into werewolf lore, so deep into it in fact, that the police chief has covered up every murder, including of his own fiancée, so that Pembroke could take a crack at finding the wolf before all the other werewolf hunters (???) descend on London. However, he has realized, much to his dismay, that his son might be a lyncanthrope. Anyway, meanwhile, the twins dig deeper into an old scandal that is totally related, regardless of Jessica’s impressive inability to put two and two together. Also, the werewolf is stalking them. Or possibly it’s a human with a nose like a werewolf, or a raccoon. Elizabeth continues to cheat on her boy back home with zero remorse as Robert, Jessica’s fancy boyfriend (son to Pembroke) skips town when he’s accused of being the werewolf murderer in the press. Sadly, this does not bring the werewolf hunters into London, as promised. But, the absolute willingness of every character in this book arc to believe in werewolves is astounding. Also meanwhile, the missing princess (remember her?) thinks about returning home, and while a MISSING PRINCESS would be a major plot point in any other book, it somehow seems to be wildly unrelated to anything. Can Jessica prove her adult boyfriend’s innocence? Will Elizabeth cheating on hers ever come back to bite her? Are they actually all living in an alternate reality where werewolves are a thing? Find out with the finale of the three-book saga from 1994: Love and Death in London, A Date with a Werewolf, and Beware the Wolfman.

Theme: Earning Happiness by John Bartmann.

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