Content note: This essay discusses body image struggles, diet culture, and the ways girls’ bodies are shaped by harmful cultural messaging.

It was the 90s. I was a teen, and the word midriff was used a lot. Mostly because we weren’t allowed to expose it in school. Not that I would have been “allowed” to expose mine.

My belly was not flat. Therefore it was not acceptable to be seen. Only mocked. Only allowed to be hated. Only shamed for enjoying food.

It has come to my attention now that my childhood was shaped by perverts. My body image carefully constructed by the whims of pedophiles.

This is the great unpacking. A new beginning. A reckoning.

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