Gameweek One is in the books, and already the drama has unfolded. I'mDirtyButNotASlot and Nigel untangle what we already know... we have no idea what we're doing.

Haaland and Salah? Both lived up to their hefty price tags with stellar performances, leaving managers wondering if there’s room for both in their squads—or just room for regret if they don’t. Chelsea’s Cucurella might want to reconsider his hairstyle after being left in Salah’s dust, while Man City’s Savinho proved a bargain-in-waiting, even with his early injury.