We live in a world that emphasises action. Of course, action is required to get things done and achieve goals. However, reflection is vital to ensure we are doing the right things.

Key Aspects

Two major observations inspired this episode:

1) Gerrit wondered what the secret of his most successful executive coaching clients was. To his surprise, he found that a critical success factor was reflection. The clients who make the most significant changes in their lives put in extra time for reflection. They gain more clarity on the insights from their coaching sessions. They let this sink in before deciding their course of action. They make daily reflections a habit and, every time, come prepared for the next coaching session.

2) During a recent workshop, we gave senior leaders a set of reflection questions that looked "innocent" on the surface. However, these questions completely interrupted their thinking patterns. Participants found the questions challenging to answer. Others commented, "I have never thought about this before!"

"How good am I at walking my own talk? In which situations might I feel misalignment between my inner values and what I do?" was one of our most powerful questions. We were surprised to see how disturbing a question like that can be, even for very senior leaders.

Leaders must find time to think and reflect. Without reflection, you risk continuing daily routines that prevent necessary changes. Reflection helps increase awareness, clarify what really matters and what you need to do. 

What keeps leaders from setting the necessary time aside to reflect? 

We all seem too busy. And being busy is often seen as positive because you look active. During reflection, the external observer notices no action, although a lot is going on inside.

Leaders tend to think they have no time. Thus, the first reflection question is: "how am I spending the 24 hours that I'm given every day?"

How can leaders practically set time aside for reflection?

You can start each morning by setting an intention for the day. This requires hardly any time and can be done under the shower.

At any time during the day, you can stop and pause for just a moment and ask yourself "why am I doing what I'm doing? Am I doing this because it really matters? Is it aligned with the intention I set this morning?"

In the evening, you can ask, "did I do what I intended to do? If not, what can I do differently tomorrow?" You can develop a whole set of daily questions, e.g., "what have I accomplished today? What can I be proud of? What can I be grateful for today? Have I done my best to connect with people?" 

You can use other questions to cover longer intervals; a week, a month, a year, and review what was good, what you should continue doing, and what you need to change.

You need to identify the best set of reflection that suits your individual needs, eventually through trial and error. You will figure out quickly which questions are most useful to you. 

The more significant questions in life, such as, "what really matters to me? What are my core values in life? What do I want to do with my life?" may require a bit more time but eventually, answers will emerge. 

People might avoid asking these questions because they feel they don't know the answers. Others avoid them because deep down below, they know already that what they are doing today is not what they should be doing. And they don't want to deal with that. But making time for such questions (and staying with what might feel uncomfortable) is essential if you want to avoid regrets on your deathbed.

For more info, visit secondcrackleadership.com