I sometimes think the world would run more smoothly if I were in charge. Or let’s face it: I often think that. Do you? 

The problem, or one problem (because there are many), with this kind of thinking is, first I have to believe I know what’s best for others. I don’t mean when that’s my job. I mean when it’s my colleague or partner or kid.

The next problem is, when I think I know what’s best, I’m judging, or pitying, the other person for not knowing…especially when they don’t follow my thinking. Which makes it hard for me to approach them with positive regard: I know what’s best, they’re not paying attention, they’d deserve my positive regard if only they were.

So one thing I’m trying to do more is, not be in charge. What a relief. It’s so relaxing. It feels good to remember that, all evidence to the contrary, everyone is just doing their best. And it feels great to take the long view, the view of not knowing, and just be with what is.