We assume things about our relationships, we assume things about our partners. Sometimes we delude ourselves about things we feel uncertain or insecure about.
We as human beings have a rich history of many styles of relationships and marriages, styles of rearing children, and different styles of sexual expression.
Humans have exhibited a rich diversity of of sexual-spiritual behavior throughout history. Most modern people are unaware of this diversity.
The only moralistic suggestion I make is to have conscious agreement in your relationships, focusing on trust and mutual comprehension.