This week’s Snark Factor 3 in 3 — Week in Review pulls together the headlines that made your shoulders tighten… and the ones that made absolutely no sense.

Doctors in the UK are warning that kids and technology aren’t just a “screen time” problem anymore — they’re calling it the early signs of a public health emergency. Meanwhile, Americans are discovering that grocery prices don’t hurt equally, and nothing feels more condescending than budgeting advice from a completely different ZIP code.

We check in on bartenders’ end-of-night drinks (less “craft,” more cry for help), Iran’s missing uranium (a mystery that does not spark joy), and a Pokémon shop robbery that somehow involved guns, hammers, and cardboard dragons worth more than a car.

There’s also:

Weather forecasts that sound like disaster-movie auditions

Goodwill begging people to stop donating damp hope

Heart disease still winning, just by fewer points

Corporate language infecting parenting

TikTok being “fixed” by a new group of billionaires

AI clones doing the meetings

And Pop-Tarts teaming up with Peeps, because of course they did

Same rules as always: serious news, undercut authority, escalate absurdity, land it quietly.

This is The Snark Factor 3 in 3 — Week in Review.