Smart takes. Stupid predictions. You decide which is which.

In this inaugural spiral, I unpack why The Summer I Turned Pretty is just Twilight with beach waves and passive-aggression, how Sydney Sweeney’s American Eagle ad accidentally soft-launches a eugenics campaign, and why Trump cheating at golf is the least surprising and most American thing he’s ever done.

We also talk about:

• The Flagrant podcast is giving Trump a verbal back massage
• The great fantasy franchise heist (Harry Potter owes Tolkien royalties and vibes)
• And whether “hot girl” is a demographic, a dog whistle, or just a durable myth

If you’re into pop culture, soft power, and placing emotional wagers on people who shouldn’t have platforms, you’re in the right place.