Think with the Heart

Part one: Look at your relationships and at the events of your life:

• Look for people that upset you
• Look at the frustrating situations
• See the ones you cannot change, or will take time to change

Don’t relive the upset or frustration, just note it.

Part two: Look at the relationships and events you cannot change — the driver who cuts you off, the boss / supervisor who’s not supportive, the relative who criticizes you. Imagine they no longer do this. See how much more pleasant your life would be.

Part three: Picture yourself no longer being upset or frustrated in those settings. You may use the following to help you drop your frustration / upset:

• Use humor. See yourself being cut off by another driver and score how bad their move was, or picture yourself awarding a prize to the child who made the biggest mess.
• Imagine yourself deflecting another’s criticism by changing the conversation. See how you can talk about something else.
• Develop compassion. People who give others a hard time aren’t happy. Think about where / how their pains arose?
• Learn from difficult settings. Use these times to picture yourself being a better boss when it’s your turn, a nicer neighbor, or a better relative.
• Appreciate that your frustrations issues aren’t about long-term issues. You were cut off but didn’t crash. Neither you nor that supervisor / boss will be there forever. Your kids will be out of the house one day.

Change will occur even if you do nothing more than picture these changes. With work, however these changes will occur sooner. You’ll be happier, more present, and feel better. Details of this work will be the subject of Episode 4.

Quotations:

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” ― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud. ― Maya Angelou

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.  ― Rumi

What you do makes a difference, and you decide what kind of difference you want to make. ― Jane Goodall

The universe was born in love and is sustained in love.  ― Sheldon Stoff

Our first teacher is our own heart. ― from the Cheyenne-