This Is Not Advice

Our fathers didn’t have all the answers and neither do we.

In this episode of This Is Not Advice, my wife and I have an honest conversation about mentorship, guidance, and the things I’m still learning as a man and a partner. She asks questions that push my thinking and challenge me to reflect on what I was taught, what I wasn’t taught, and what I now have a responsibility to learn for myself.

We also discuss my favorite book, Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates, and what it has taught me about fatherhood, identity, responsibility, and growth.

This conversation is about becoming more intentional, developing the tools to show up better in relationships, and giving ourselves grace along the way.

#ThisIsNotAdvice #Fatherhood #Marriage #Mentorship #Relationships #BetweenTheWorldAndMe #PersonalGrowth

We didn’t just get married once… we’ve had to choose each other through every new version of ourselves. 💍Marriage changed us. Then each of our three kids changed us again. New responsibilities. New needs. New priorities. New versions of Kareem and Shannon.The real work has been learning how to love the person your spouse is becoming—not just the person you originally married.🎙️ We Got Married 4x — out now.

144 hours. That’s how long Shannon once went without speaking to Kareem. She calls cap..

In this episode, they unpack what that silence taught them about communication, conflict, and giving each other space to process. Kareem learned not to rush Shannon when she needs time to process feelings (Kareem is learning to value this more), while Shannon learned that needing space shouldn’t mean completely icing your partner out.

They discuss how they communicate their needs more clearly, reconnect after conflict, and use prayer and devotion to help close the distance—or how Kareem tries to use prayer and devotionals to get Shannon to communicate quicker. 😂

Sometimes silence is necessary. But communication is golden.

What does submission actually mean in a modern relationship? Kareem and Shannon unpack the tension between partnership, leadership, autonomy, and traditional gender roles—and how culture, religion, and personal experience shape those beliefs.

Kareem also reflects on masculinity through his lens as a Black man in America in 2026, including how outdated ideas of male leadership can sometimes become controlling, rigid, and limiting to a partner’s voice.

This episode asks a bigger question: Can submission exist in a healthy relationship without sacrificing equality, individuality, or mutual respect?

Did the pandemic save our marriage? Is marriage worth it? 

We believe it is but marriage requires constant updates, sometimes more than an iPhone.

In a five-year span, we went from having three children to losing two parents. That emotional roller coaster changed what we needed from each other and forced us to learn how to love one another through grief.

Shannon shares how her grief support group helped her heal, while Kareem reflects on the learning curve of supporting a grieving spouse. They also discuss how both partners must communicate their needs during loss, change, and major life transitions.

We also share how we grew closer to God after finding a church that welcomed questions, critical thinking, and social justice without feeling judgmental.

This Is Not Advice, but our story may make you reflect on grief, growth, and why we still believe marriage is worth it.

SB: Kareem discusses going almost a year without getting a haircut during the pandemic. Did Shannon still think he was sexy?

At 29, Kareem was convinced he didn’t need therapy. In his mind, therapy was for “crazy people.” Shannon saw things differently and eventually convinced him to give it a chance.

They tried therapy individually and as a couple, hoping it would strengthen their relationship. Instead, therapy forced them to confront uncomfortable truths, better understand themselves, and eventually contributed to a decision neither expected: breaking up.

In this honest and vulnerable episode, Kareem and Shannon unpack the stigma surrounding therapy, what counseling revealed about their relationship, and how getting help doesn’t always keep people together—sometimes, it helps you see what needs to change.

This Is Not Advice, but their story might challenge how you think about therapy, relationships, breakups, and personal growth.

#ThisIsNotAdvicePodcast #CouplesPodcast #RelationshipPodcast #CouplesTherapy #TherapyStigma #MentalHealthMatters #RelationshipGrowth #

#MarriageTalk #RealRelationshipTalk #BlackMentalHealth #HealingJourney #PersonalGrowth #HealthyRelationships #RelationshipLessons #PodcastEpisode #NewPodcast #PodcastRecommendations #BreakupStory #TherapyJourney

What happens when being “right” matters more than being understood?

In Episode 1 of This Is Not Advice, Kareem reveals the story behind The Petty Files, a secret photo album filled with “evidence” of everything Shannon supposedly did wrong around the house. 😂📸

It started as a way to win arguments, but years later, they’re unpacking what it really revealed about listening, communication, criticism, ego, and growth in a relationship.

Was Kareem being strategic… or just petty? And would you forgive your partner for keeping receipts on you?

🎙️ Listen to The Petty Files now and tell us:
Would you ever create a petty file on your partner?

#ThisIsNotAdvice #ThePettyFiles #MarriagePodcast #RelationshipPodcast #CouplesPodcast #BlackLove #CommunicationMatters #PodcastEpisode