Through the Looking Glass

Through the Looking Glass

By Lavanya UthamanEducationSelf-Improvement
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Through the Looking Glass episodes

  • Things I wish I knew in my 20s

    Are you looking for some guidance? Do you want to thrive in your 20s? In this week’s episode, Lavanya shares her list of things you wish you knew in your 20s! Lavanya turning 30 recently reflects on the lessons, tough truths, and personal growth that shaped her during her 20s.

    From learning the power of saying “no” to cultivating financial independence and recognizing the value of self-love, Lavanya shares invaluable insights to help you navigate this transformative decade.

    Whether you're dealing with uncertainty, seeking better relationships, or aiming to build confidence, this episode will empower you to thrive. Tune in, take what resonates, and start living your best life!

    Get to know me better on

    Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠

    TikTok: https://tiktok.com/lavanya.uthaman

    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@throughthelookingglasspod

    Chapters

    0:00 Introduction

    1:32 1. "No" is a full sentence

    2:10 2. Stop being friends with Negative People

    3:03 3. Financial Independence

    4:01 4. Money Empowers You

    4:38 5. Time Doesn’t Heal Everything

    5:22 6. You Won’t Find Someone by Not Looking

    6:07 7. Wait 30 secs Before Reacting

    6:41 8. Don’t Work for “Free”

    7:32 9. Let Go of Things You Can’t Control

    8:03 10. Not Everyone Has Your Best Interest

    8:29 11. Keep It Private Until It's Official

    9:03 12. Avoid Long-Distance Relationships

    9:38 13. Stop Waiting for the Right Time

    10:15 14. Only Compare Yourself to Yourself

    10:53 15. No One Is Thinking About You

    11:43 16. Enjoy Being Young & Hot

    12:15 17. Over-Communicate

    12:45 18. Stop Being Nice to Everyone

    13:19 19. Spend on Experiences, Not Things

    13:59 20. No One Will Love You as Much as Yourself



    16 min
  • Identity, Family and Mental Health as a South Asian Woman with Dr. Nadia Huq
    Are you a second generation South Asian trying to balance cultural expectations? Navigating traditional gender roles, generational conflicts, parental pressure can all be challenging! In this week’s episode on "Through the Looking Glass," Lavanya interviews Dr. Nadia Huq, a clinical psychologist specializing in family dynamics.
    Dr. Huq shares insights on generational shifts, the nuances of managing parental expectations, particularly around marriage, and setting boundaries while maintaining healthy relationships. This podcast offers practical advice for young South Asian women navigating these unique cultural and ethnic identity challenges.
    Get to know Nadia more:
    Dr. Nadia Huq earned her Bachelor's in Brain, Behavior, and Cognitive Science from the University of Michigan in 2008, followed by a Master's and PhD in Clinical Psychology from UNC Greensboro by 2016. She completed her Pre-doctoral Internship at Children’s National Health Systems and a Postdoctoral fellowship in Clinical Child Psychology at NYP-CUIMC. Dr. Huq served as a clinical psychologist and faculty member at Columbia University Irving Medical Center for six years, specializing in therapy for children and families and training psychology interns. She joined TMB Psychological Services in 2023.
    Get to know me better on Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠
    TikTok: https://tiktok.com/lavanya.uthaman
    Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@throughthelookingglasspod
    Chapters:
    00:00 Intro to Dr. Nadia Huq
    02:24 Understanding gender roles in South Asian families
    05:25 Cultural identity and acculturation conflicts
    09:42 Managing parental expectations
    14:32 Mental Health in South Asian Immigrant families
    18:25 Navigating toxicity in families
    22:37 How to set boundaries w/family
    30:28 Navigating familial pressure
    38:22 Marriage in South Asian culture
    49:55 Advice for brown girls in their 20s
    53 min
  • How to stop being a GOOD GIRL | a South Asian perspective

    Were you ever told to be a “good girl” by your family? To please others, avoid mistakes, and keep the peace? In this episode of Through the Looking Glass Podcast, Lavanya dives deep into the "good girl" syndrome, a mindset that many women, especially in South Asian communities, have internalized from a young age.


    She discusses the impact of people-pleasing, perfectionism, and sacrifice culture, and offers practical steps to shift away from these internalized habits. But how do you break free from this cycle? Lavanya shares 5 actionable steps to shift your mindset to take your power back! Don’t miss this episode to learn how to prioritize your well-being, set boundaries, and embrace personal empowerment.


    Get to know me better on

    Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/lavanyauthaman

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@lavanya.uthaman


    Chapters:
    00:00 Introduction

    01:12 What is "Good Girl" Syndrome?

    02:34 Why you need to stop being a Good Girl

    04:50 Mindset shift 1: Be Inconvenient

    06:50 Mindset shift 2: Setting Boundaries

    09:01 Mindset shift 3: What Do I Need Right Now?

    10:32 Mindset shift 4: Stop Saying Sorry

    11:58 Mindset shift 5: Sit in the Discomfort


    15 min
  • How to be a Girl’s Girl | Stop being a Pick-me Girl
    Are you losing friends? Are you called out for being a "pick-me girl"? This week on Through the Looking Glass Lavanya talks about pick-me-girl syndrome and the dynamics of female friendship etiquette.
    Discover the definition and signs of a "pick-me girl" and learn how to shift from being one to embracing the empowering role of a girl's girl. Lavanya breaks down five practical steps to go from pick-me girl to girl’s girl! This episode is all about prioritizing female friendships, how to uplift the women around you, avoid toxic behaviors, and create lasting, meaningful connections.
    Get to know me better on Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ttlg_podcast
    Chapters:
    00:00 Introduction
    00:52 What is a Pick-me Girl and Signs!
    03:55 Step1: Stop dropping everything
    05:28 Step 2: Peer Pressure
    07:34 Step 3: Work on Maturity
    09:30 Step 4: Stop Gossiping
    11:10 Step 5: Defend your friends!
    14 min
  • Entrepreneurship with a dose of Imposter Syndrome with Dhaval Patel

    Are you considering starting your own company? And you feel like an imposter? Highly recommend tuning into this episode of Through the Looking Glass, with Dhaval Patel. He is the CEO and founder of Lotus Labs, dedicated to empowering individuals with limited mobility. Dhaval shares his personal disability story that sparked the creation of the Lotus ring and how he went from an Apple engineer to an entrepreneur.

    We spoke about the challenges, triumphs, and all of the self-doubt in between. Are there philosophical motivations behind taking the entrepreneurial leap? We took a real look at the reality of entrepreneurship – passion, resilience and mindset. Gain insights into Dhaval’s perspective as a South Asian tech founder and how he counteracts imposter feelings.
    Whether you're an aspiring entrepreneur or navigating the corporate world as a minority, this episode provides inspiration and actionable lessons!
    Get to know me better on Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ttlg_podcast
    Get to know Dhaval: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dhaval-c-patel/
    Learn about Lotus Ring: https://getlotus.com/


    Chapters:

    00:00 Introduction

    03:10 How did you get started with your company?

    05:55 Is finding purpose in work important?

    10:38 How to choose co-founders/partners

    20:05 How did you overcome a challenge in entrepreneurship?

    27:30 How was your experience as a minority entrepreneur?

    37:00 Uncharted career path as a South Asian

    42:27 How to shift out of imposter syndrome

    47:42 Dhaval’s advice for aspiring entrepreneurs

    51 min
  • Imposter Syndrome | Is it real or not?
    Do you feel like you don’t deserve your success? Do you question your talents or abilities? – You may be feeling imposter syndrome! In this week's episode Lavanya shares how to overcome imposter syndrome.
    Lavanya discusses the various signs of imposter syndrome, including her personal journey with imposter syndrome, reflecting on her experiences as an engineering student in a male-dominated field.
    Listeners will learn practical strategies to overcome imposter syndrome, including reframing negative thoughts, recognizing and celebrating achievements. Lavanya also addresses the broader societal context of imposter syndrome and why we need to challenge these limiting beliefs.
    Get to know me better on Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ttlg_podcast
    Chapters:
    00:00 Introduction
    01:03 What is Imposter Syndrome?
    02:02 Signs of Imposter Syndrome
    04:10 Personal Storytime
    06:29 Signs you don’t have Imposter Syndrome
    07:52 Overcome Imposter Syndrome
    10:20 Bicycle Face Storytime
    12:59 Summary
    14 min
  • 10 Dating Rules of a High-Value Woman
    Are you the one getting played or manipulated? Chasing an emotionally unavailable man? GIRL, STOP and listen to this episode. Welcome back to Through the Looking Glass Podcast.
    In today's episode, Lavanya shares a list of dating rules that resonates with her. Whether you're navigating situationships, learning to let him take the lead, or setting strong boundaries, these rules are designed to help you become a high-value dater. Lavanya gives some practical examples and tips to help you apply these rules in your dating life.
    If you're ready to stop settling and step into your black cat era, this episode is for you. You will learn how to become a high-value dater.
    Get to know me better on Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ttlg_podcast
    Chapters:
    00:00 Introduction
    01:33 Stop with the Situationships
    03:24 Let him Lead
    06:20 Set Boundaries
    09:15 Be Independent
    12:23 Stop making his life easier
    14:39 Don’t Nag
    17:11 Control your emotions
    19:24 Financial Independence
    20:55 Mental Challenge
    22:00 Keep it Private
    23:20 Summary
    25 min
  • How to Heal Anxious Attachment Style
    Are you someone who constantly needs reassurance in a relationship? Do you have a fear of abandonment? Do you think you can only count on yourself? – You may have an insecure attachment!
    This week on Through the Looking Glass, Lavanya delves into attachment styles. With social media overload about anxious and avoidant attachment styles, it's hard to what information is accurate. If you are serious about your dating goals, understanding attachment theory is critical. Lavanya personally experienced anxious attachment, so she is invested in sharing tips to move towards a secure attachment.
    This episode focuses on understanding signs of anxious attachment and how to heal your wound. Lavanya summarizes what is attachment theory and how it is developed in early childhood. You will get scenarios to identify signs of anxious attachment with 10 explicit signs to look out for. The remainder of the episode focuses on 5 step guide to healing anxious attachment.
    Thank you for joining me on this journey to heal anxious attachment. I hope you found these tips helpful. Feel free to share your experiences or suggestions.
    Get to know me better on Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ttlg_podcast
    Chapters
    00:00 Introduction
    01:24 Understanding Attachment theory
    05:47 Recognizing Anxious Attachment (10 signs)
    08:47 Step 1 – Inner work
    10:56 Step 2 – Identifying Triggers
    12:30 Step 3- Avoid Overreacting
    14:19 Step 4- Give and Take Space
    16:05 Step 5 – Setting Boundaries
    17:35 Bonus tip and summary
    19 min
  • How to deal with identity change (Graduation, Big life transitions)
    Are you going through an identity crisis? Maybe you are one of the graduates this May, and you are struggling with identity change as a student, or you moved cities or pivoted careers.
    This week on Through the Looking Glass Podcast, Lavanya talks about going through identity shifts. This episode is particularly relevant for graduates tackling life-altering transitions.
    Lavanya shares insights on recognizing signs of identity crisis and offers actionable tips for coping with uncertainty and embracing change. She has a 4-step guide to navigate this confusing time period. Whether you're graduating, changing careers, or embarking on a new chapter, this podcast offers practical advice to help you find your footing.
    Get to know me better on Instagram: ⁠Lavanya | Podcast Host (@lavanyauthaman) | Instagram profile⁠
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ttlg_podcast
    Chapters:
    00:00 Introduction
    01:00 What is Identity change?
    02:55 7 Signs of Identity Crisis
    03:44 Identity Change as new Graduates
    05:50 Tip 1: Acknowledge and accept your feelings
    07:38 Tip 2: Understand negative emotions
    09:38 Tip 3: Redefine core beliefs and values
    10:45 Tip 4: Goal Setting
    11:49 Summary
    13 min
  • How to Resolve Conflict | DEAR MAN Technique
    Have you ever found yourself in the midst of a heated argument? Whether it's with your significant other, family, or colleagues, communication breakdowns can be daunting. In this episode of Through the Looking Glass Podcast, host Lavanya introduces “DEAR MAN”, a Dialectical Behavior Therapy technique.
    Lavanya dives into the seven-step process of DEAR MAN. It teaches a strategy for effective communication structured to guide individuals towards constructive dialogue and conflict resolution.
    Lavanya illustrates DEAR MAN in two scenarios, involving romantic relationships and family dynamics. Listeners can gain insight into how to implement this technique in real-life situations. Learn how to set boundaries in any relationship and navigate conflict with confidence and compassion.
    Get to know me better:
    Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/lavanyauthaman⁠
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ttlg_podcast
    Chapters:
    00:00 Introduction
    00:58 What is DEAR MAN?
    04:15 Example 1 in Romantic Relationship
    06:12 Example 2 with Family
    07:51 Summary
    9 min

About Through the Looking Glass

From the publisher's feed

Are you an ambitious individual part of the South Asian diaspora, trying to find your authentic voice and place in a community? Look no further! Through the Looking Glass podcast, with Lavanya Uthaman, is one Zillennial’s viewpoint on life’s struggles. She explores different perspectives by sharing personal stories with guests and solo episodes biweekly. Her vision is to empower listeners, even in the smallest way possible, to enhance personal well-being and cultivate an inclusive community.