As tough as tough love is to give, it causes "capable" people to grow from "their" choices. The enabling stops and God can reveal the life lessons He can teach you both through "their" decisions. So resist the temptation to play God. Trust those humans to God with your support, love, and compassion and watch the spiritual growth. Here's what Jeremiah 29:11 has to say for all of us: "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. Plans for good and not disaster, to give you a future and a hope."