Time for Us, With Dani Wallace

Why do we keep reaching for things we know aren't good for us?

In this episode, I sit down with Rochelle Odendaal, a psychology and counselling graduate, mind-body coach, and someone in recovery herself — for a conversation about addiction that quickly becomes a conversation about being human.

We talk about what sits underneath our need to escape: fear, shame, control, loneliness, perfectionism and the discomfort of simply being WITH ourselves. Rochelle shares what recovery has taught her about emotional sobriety, reconnecting with her body, and taking responsibility without shame.

Because whether it's alcohol, substances, food, work, relationships, scrolling or something else entirely, most of us have something we reach for when reality becomes uncomfortable.

You can follow Rochelle on Instagram to keep up with her work, or send her a DM if you'd like to learn more about her mind-body coaching and working with her directly.

Rochelle's Instagram: @roch_odendaal

Let us know what you think of the episode.

Always with the best intentions, Dani

Disclaimer: This episode is for informational and personal storytelling purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or addiction treatment. If anything in this conversation resonates with what you’re going through, know that support is available, and reaching out to a qualified professional can be a really important first step.

Do you truly know what you like?Or, in a world where we're constantly being shown what to wear, buy, create and aspire to... have we all become a little too influenced?This week I'm joined by the wildly creative Emily King, a designer with an unmistakable personal style, who spent a decade designing for Sissy-Boy before taking the leap to build her own wonderfully expressive and original world, Emily King Universe.Em is someone I've always admired for the way she creates and expresses herself. She isn't afraid to be bold, experiment, take up space or do things completely her own way, which made her the perfect person to explore originality with.We talk about finding your own taste, where inspiration ends, and imitation begins, trusting your creative instincts, and being brave enough to stand out.A conversation about creativity, fashion, confidence, self-expression and giving yourself permission to take up space.DO NOT SLEEP on Emily King UniverseFollow Em's journey on IG (her personal page) | (her brand's page)

In part one ('I hope I'm not running out of time'), we met Resistance...that invisible force that convinces us to put off the work that matters most.

But knowing what's holding us back is only half the story.

In this episode I continue unpacking some of the most impactful ideas from Steven Pressfield's The War of Art; we explore what it takes to honour our calling. We talk about what it means to be a professional when it comes to creating, why waiting to feel inspired is a trap, and more.

I hope this is the nudge you need to start 'That Thing' you've held off on because you haven't felt ready yet.

"Creative work is...a gift to the world and every being in it. Don't cheat us of your contribution. Give us what you've got." –Steven Pressfield. The book is worth a purchase; it's got so much wisdom to share that is untouched in these episodes.

BTW my tiger rug that you see peeking out in the corner there is from Shelby Finds . Each piece is designed here in South Africa, then hand-tufted in India using traditional techniques and 100% wool.

Most of us carry an unlived life inside us.

The book we haven't written, the business we haven't started, the spiritual practice we can't commit to, the photography we won't share... you get the point.

There's a version of ourselves we're terrified to become.

In this episode, inspired by Steven Pressfield's The War of Art, I explore the invisible force he calls Resistance. And more importantly, the fear, procrastination and self-doubt that show up when we start moving towards the work that matters most.

If you've ever felt called towards something but found every excuse not to begin, this episode is for you.

Part 1 of a two-part series. Part 2 is out next Wednesday.

I hope you enjoy and thank you for making Time for Us xxx

We've all heard that little voice that says, "Just push through. You can rest later." And so often, we listen to it, overriding the signals our body is desperately trying to send us until one day, it stops asking and starts demanding our attention.

In this episode, I'm joined by Talia Zaken, someone many people in Cape Town know as a DJ, event host and curator, interior designer, all-round creative force. She shares the story of how years of pushing through, saying yes to everything, and tying her worth to productivity eventually caught up with her. Whether you're burnt out, running on empty, or just constantly telling yourself, "I'll rest after this one more thing," I think there's something in this conversation for you.

Thank you for making Time For Us. Let us know what you think of this episode. XXX

P.S. Here’s a link to the Yoga Nidra that Tali mentions and swears by.

One and a half years ago, I told you I was coming off my antidepressants.

This is the update.

I spent far longer than I should have convincing myself that struggling was the price I had to pay to become a better version of myself.

In this episode, I'm sharing what happened after trying to prove (to myself and to others) that I didn't need help. I unpack the difference between the kind of discomfort that helps us grow and the kind that subtly, over time, erodes our quality of life, why I no longer believe we should glorify struggle, and how self-compassion might be one of the bravest choices we can make.

Thank you for making Time For Us. Let me know what you think of this episode. XXX

My dad and I have had a rather contentious and strained relationship for a significant part of my life. We are still learning what it means to be father and daughter to one another. He was kind of an absent father (sorry, Dad, but you would admit that yourself). That said, I was always cared for and provided for as best he could, and I love my dad. This episode is not about dredging up the past in unhelpful or accusatory ways; it was an opportunity to solidify our more recent growth together (following his Easter visit to Cape Town).

We are TRULY and I-kid-you-not LeArNiNg how to relate to one another. How to call each other more often and how to ask questions that elicit honest answers about ourselves and our lives. We're learning to share our little pains, our discomforts, and our joys with each other. It feels like we have only just begun to open up to one another in a way that allows us to be seen as we are, without input or rejection (and this last point is something I'm sure we're both practising really hard, hahaha). Perhaps this is a gift that could only arrive with the passage of time?

It's really interesting to learn to be in an authentic relationship with a parent (in this case, my father), at this stage in the game - 33 years in lol. It's healing, and beautiful, and extremely vulnerable. THANK YOU for coming on the pod, Popsicle (AKA, Norman – who you'll meet soon). I LOVE YOU. Here's to many more years of growth and evolution together.

P.S. My technical wars are ongoing - the video on my one recording apparatus bombed out (obviously), and I only realised much too late - the camera angles are choppy and a bit f*cked up, but I hope the listening is impactful. Thank you for making Time For Us, let me know what you think of this episode. XXX

Part 2 is here... In this episode, I break down the cycle: feeling good, pushing harder, slipping into anxiety, then burning out. I talk through what’s happening in our nervous systems (polyvagal theory), and hopefully, JUST HOPEFULLY, we all leave with some clarity on how to keep chasing our dreams… without constantly dysregulating ourselves (and losing our marbles along the way).

This is part 2 of 2.

It forms the grand debut of Season 4's new direction, which is a series of episodes that fall under my most sincere human longing: "I hope it all works out".

New episode on Wednesdays. Thank you for making Time For Us. xxx

We're all trying to achieve some level of success... In my quest to do cool shit, I've begun to wonder WHY IS THIS SO TAXING!? Ambition is supposed to feel exciting (isn't it?). So why do I feel like it's slowly eroding my sense of self? This episode dives into the psychology of motivation, the 'achievement trap', and the question I'm still trying to answer: which version of me in my hustling, driven, goal-oriented era can coexist with peace?

This is part 1 of 2.

It forms the grand debut of Season 4's new direction, which is a series of episodes that fall under my most sincere human longing: "I hope it all works out".

New episode every Wednesday. Thank you for making Time For Us. xxx

Gossip is a universal human behaviour; it weirdly bonds us, regulates group dynamics, and can help us decide who feels safe (btw, this is not my opinion, but that of academic researchers). BUT there are moments when it turns harmful, feels addictive, and can lead to us tearing each other down. In this episode, I take a look at GOSSIP - what it means, why we do it, and if we need to be so hard on ourselves for it.PS. This is not a defence of being mean, nor is it a lecture on being 'good'.It's just a curious, honest look at why we talk about people when they’re not in the room.