The Unbecoming Hub Podcast

To Be Human is to Need


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In this episode, I explore something that keeps surfacing in my clinical work: the resistance many of us feel toward admitting that we need relationship.

There’s a cultural narrative that equates needing with weakness — that if you were secure enough, whole enough, evolved enough, you wouldn’t need anyone. You would simply want them. But when we slow down, that distinction starts to feel less clear.

What is the difference between dependency and need?
Why does naming a relational need feel so vulnerable?
And what happens when independence becomes armor?

In this conversation, I reflect on how our relationship with need forms early, how culture reinforces self-sufficiency as virtue, and why the human need for connection doesn’t disappear just because we grow up.

To be human is to need. Not in a collapsing way. Not in a childlike way. But in a relational way.

This episode is an invitation to notice your own relationship with needing — where it feels charged, where it feels defended, and what might shift if you let it be simple.

If this resonates, I explore these themes more deeply in Phase Two: Unraveling inside The Process of Unbecoming.

You can learn more at theunbecominghub.com.

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The Unbecoming Hub PodcastBy Lacey K. Kelly