Today, Tami will give you some great insight and tips from one of her favorite self-help books, "Self-Esteem" by Dr. Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning. If you battle your inner critic and would like relief, tune in!! (Show notes with links at https://www.tamiwest.com/post/show-notes-cyh-episode-33-our-inner-critics-are-winning-why-and-how-to-get-a-grip?fbclid=IwAR0OHxFKWwhyFd4MrS9lmZB2NCAyYzsvwevTPoRppW_bWMkIhOrSzkoGGYc)

Episode #33: Today’s Hug - Our Inner Critics Are Winning! Why, and How to Get a Grip

Thanks for visiting with us at for Consider Yourself Hugged: Mental & emotional well-being.” Do you find yourself thinking, "Life can be so overwhelming! I feel so frustrated all the time! I worry about everything! I wish I could speak up more and not be a doormat!" If you're looking for improved mental and emotional well-being, please join me every Wednesday as we talk about how to make positive choices in your life.

*Disclaimer:
The information in this show is not intended to be therapy or to address your individual situation. It is information based on my experiences, opinions, and research. If you need further help, please reach out to one of the resources mentioned in the show notes.

About me:
Tami West, PhD 
Stress and Mental Health Expert Dr. Tami West uses her entertaining and 
compelling style to shine a new light on how to transform your life and discover solutions to life’s challenges. Her passion stems from a lifelong battle with an anxiety disorder which has uniquely equipped her to teach, encourage, and motivate others. 

Tami has worked in a variety of industries including healthcare, school nutrition, corporate sales, and 10 years as a public-school teacher. In 2013 she received her PhD in Human Development, studying the connections among stress, emotions, and identity. 

Dr. West has spoken in 48 states across the US, as well as the United Kingdom, Australia, and New Zealand. 

Dr. West is the author of several successful publications including two books: The Stress Club, Life Without the Monsters and Thrive. She is a mother of eight in a blended family and enjoys reading historical fiction, traveling with her husband Tim and family, and watching The Big Bang Theory.

Health & Fitness

Yearbooks are snapshots of a time we often look back on with mixed emotions. For some, they encapsulate memories of friendships, triumphs, and the journey of self-discovery. For others, they are a reminder of challenging times, struggles with identity, and the harsh realities of adolescence. This is especially true for those who, like me, were quiet, bullied, and not popular. My middle school and high school years were marked by a turbulent home life, living in poverty, and the challenges of being overweight.

Despite these hardships, revisiting my yearbooks has provided valuable insights into my identity during those formative years. It has been a journey of understanding who I was, who I am, and who I aspire to be. This episode is an exploration of those reflections, lessons learned, and the ways we can all find strength in our past experiences.

As I reflect on these yearbook entries and the memories they evoke, several key lessons about identity emerge.  That's what I'll share with you today! Show notes at https://www.tamiwest.com/post/yearbooksandidentity.

Thanks for joining!

**Not intended to be therapy or replace therapy - If you need further help, please reach out to one of these resources or one in your area:

General Resources 
National Alliance of Mental Illness: https://www.nami.org 
Mental Health America: https://mhanational.org 
Mental Health First Aid Resources: https://www.mentalhealthfirstaid.org/ 
Celebrate Recovery: https://www.celebraterecovery.com/ 
About AA: https://www.aa.org/ 

Tami West, PhD Stress and Mental Health Expert 
Dr. Tami West uses her entertaining and compelling style to shine a new light on how to transform your life and discover solutions to life’s challenges.

Hug 171 Looking Back: Yearbooks, Reflections, and Lessons on Identity

Welcome to week 5 of Mental Health Awareness Month! Today I'm discussing two seemingly unrelated topics: The 1976 Chowchilla kidnappings and the death by suicide of golfer Grayson Murray. 

In 1976, 26 elementary and middle school kids and their bus driver were kidnapped by 3 armed men, their faces covered with panty hose. They were driven around for 11 hours and eventually forced to climb into a 26' trailer buried underground. After all 27 were in, the kidnappers sealed the opening and buried the remaining portion of the trailer with dirt. They dug themselves out after 16 hours. Their lives were forever changed, and because childhood trauma wasn't understood, their mental health was forever damaged.

This past week on Saturday, May 25th,  pro-golfer Grayson Murray took his life after a fairly public battle with depression, anxiety, and alcoholism. In an interview last year (Link in show notes at https://www.tamiwest.com/post/chowchilla-to-grayson-murray-mentalhealth), he said: 

I just thought I was a failure. I always looked at myself as a failure. I thought I had a lot of talent that was just a waste of talent. It was a bad place, but like I said, you have to have courage. You have to have the willingness to keep going. Lo and behold, that’s what I did, and I’m here, and I’m so blessed and I’m thankful.

He was in the public eye, and felt like a failure.

How are they related? They are related because they both help us to see both how far we have come in treatment, help, and stigma surrounding mental health AND how much more there is to be done. 

I hope you'll listen to today's episode. The reason it struck me so, in part, was because I WAS the age of those children during the Chowchilla kidnappings. In 1976 I was 12 years-old, the age where my panic attacks were debilitating, but panic attacks weren’t really a thing. I wasn’t understood. So, why did I not go down the path that some of the survivors did, including alcoholism and suicide?  And, Grayson Murray was a Christian. I am a Christian. Why did he still battle, and why do I still battle anxiety?

I think the bottom line is this:

We have amazing treatments for heart disease. People still die.

We have new treatments for cancer. People still die.

With all the mental health treatments available now and to come, people will still struggle and people will still die. It breaks my hearth.

I was thinking deeper about that question, why didn’t I go down a worse path? For me, it was and is so many things:

-My relationship with Jesus
-My family & friends
-Allowing myself to fail and to talk about it. Saying out loud, Oh gosh I messed that one up and realizing I am not perfect!
-Continuing to learn and grown
-Counseling
-Medication for seasons in my life

As we end Mental Health Awareness Month, I encourage you on 2 fronts:

1.    NEVER LET ANYONE SHAME YOU INTO NOT GETTING HELP IF YOU ARE STRUGGLING!

2.   Get trained in Mental Health First Aid. It truly changed how I view and interact with those who are struggling. I have 2 virtual classes coming up. Link with dates is in show notes which post by 7 AM CST 5/29/24.

If you or someone you know is in emotional distress or a suicidal crisis, you can reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988.

Hug 170 From Chowchilla Kidnapping to the Death of Grayson Murray

Welcome to week 4 of Mental Health Awareness Month! Today is a bit different as I'm simply going to share a very personal story with you about my epiphanies about bullying, my bully, forgiveness, and more! 

Show notes at https://www.tamiwest.com/post/bullying-to-empowerment. 

Thanks for joining!
**Not intended to be therapy or replace therapy - If you need further help, please reach out to one of the resources:
General Resources National Alliance of Mental Illness: https://www.nami.org 
Mental Health America: https://mhanational.org 
Mental Health First Aid Resources: https://www.mentalhealthfirstaid.org/ 
Celebrate Recovery: https://www.celebraterecovery.com/ A
bout AA: https://www.aa.org/ 

Tami West, PhD Stress and Mental Health Expert 
Dr. Tami West uses her entertaining and compelling style to shine a new light on how to transform your life and discover solutions to life’s challenges. 

*Disclaimer:
The information in this show is not intended to be therapy or to address your individual situation. It is information based on our experiences, opinions, and research. If you need further help, please reach out to one of the resources mentioned in the show notes.

Hug 169 From Bullying to Empowerment: My Story

In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, week 3, we're diving into another crucial aspect of mental wellbeing: Celebration!  This week I'm using more recommended resources from the National Council for Mental Well-being, the organization that sponsors the Mental Health First Aid course. You may know I am passionate about teaching that class! 

But I'm also diving a bit deeper with 4 suggestions of my own: 

1.	Decide if you want to want to actively participate in creating positive awareness for mental health.
2.	If no, that’s ok, but maybe don’t actively create NEGATIVE awareness 

Hug 168 Mental Health Awareness Month Part 3: Celebrate Mental Wellbeing!

In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, week 2,  we're diving into a crucial topic: Leading by example, and in particular: self-care. It's not just a buzzword; it's a vital part of maintaining our mental health. This week I'm using some recommended resources from the National Council for Mental Well-being, the organization that sponsors the Mental Health First Aid course.  You may know I am passionate about teaching that class!

Today, we'll explore why it’s important, how it can set an example for others, and share some practical tips on how you can incorporate self-care into your daily routine.

So how can we practice self-care? Here are four strategies recommended by the National Council:

  1. Activity Calendar: Use the National Council’s activity calendar for daily self-care ideas.
 2. Mental Health Days: Consider taking a mental health day from work this month. It’s a chance to step away from daily stresses and do something rejuvenating.
3. Relaxation Exercises: Incorporate relaxation exercises into your day. Whether it's meditation or deep breathing, these can help you stay centered.
 4. Daily Relaxing Activity: Try to do something relaxing every day, even if it’s just for 30 minutes. Whether it’s a walk, reading, or journaling, find what feels good for you.

Thanks for joining! Show notes at https://www.tamiwest.com/post/mental-health-awareness-month-part-ii-lead-by-example.

**Not intended to be therapy or replace therapy - If you need further help, please reach out to one of these resources or one in your area:

General Resources
National Alliance of Mental Illness: www.nami.org
Mental Health America: mhanational.org
Mental Health First Aid Resources: www.mentalhealthfirstaid.org/
Celebrate Recovery: www.celebraterecovery.com/
About AA: www.aa.org/

Tami West, PhD Stress and Mental Health Expert
Dr. Tami West uses her entertaining and compelling style to shine a new light on how to transform your life and discover solutions to life’s challenges.

Episode #33: Today’s Hug - Our Inner Critics Are Winning! Why, and How to Get a Grip

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