Can Trauma Healing save your relationship? We think so!

When we fall in love, it’s easy to appreciate everything about our special person. But soon enough, the inevitable differences arise, we poke at each other's trauma, and we get triggered.

A couple came to therapy recently wanting to improve their communication skills. We soon realized that even though they were triggering each others, it was not really about the other person. 90% of their triggers were about past trauma.

Definition of Trauma or Shadow: “A belief system that arises from an early core wound, that I still use to cope with the world.”

1. A belief system: “People are trying to take advantage of me. Life is fragile. I don’t deserve to be loved. Everybody ends up leaving me. People don’t change.”

2. An early core wound (aka trauma): A trauma can be a single, clearly defined event. Like being raped or emotionally overpowered. Or it could spread over the span of many years. My grandmother never brutalized me. But her incessant judgments over 15 years left me scared.

3. Coping with the world: This belief system has helped you cope with a difficult situation that happened when you were young and vulnerable. When similar situations present themselves into adult life, you still unconsciously use the same outdated strategies that you developed as a child.

In this episode, you'll learn about:

1. The 2 types of trauma.
2. The therapy modalities that woks and those that don't.
3. How to dissolve Trauma and your negative beliefs.

Recommended book: No Bad Parts: Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model, by Richard Schwartz Ph.D.