Table Of Nonsense: 

0:00 - Intro: Ghostbusters, and the intoxicated podcast that will never be. 

1:40:  2004 trip to the sex store results in fake vagina disaster at John's home

5:00:  chris has a chris moment and is afraid to offend amish people with a podcast they'll never listen to, on the internet they don't even know exists

9:40 - 2007 trip to costco for condoms results in Chris asking the stupidest questionn of his life 

12:20 -  Chris gives you his yawn

12:30 -  Rock hard cumdumpster sock can be used as a weapon

13:40 -  Chris's genius invention: "Jizz Jeans"

16:15 -  How to give your wife orgasms from the afterlife

17:45 -  John's Funeral: Burn me bitches

22:20 -  Chris literally says "FRUTATION" instead of "FRUITION" in a meeting at work. 

27:00 -  When a relationship is right, it's right.  Chris's relationship adivce. 

32:30 - John's tactic to disarm angry boyfriends

34:00 - John's strange cougar conundrum

36:55 - Chris doesn't understand exactly what "tits" are. 

42:00 -  Don't say "how was your day" too soon in a new encounter.  You will scare the person away unless they're just as into you as you are them. 

45:00 - John's family harasses him about his relationships

50:00 - Cuntie Apple Pay update..   the caveman comes back for more

51:00 - The New Orleans Uber ride that could have brutally ended our lives

59:00 - Pooping pants story

61:00 - Why doesn't Siri ever alert us that the 45 minute timer is up.. 

62:30 - SONG:  Snowflake "My First Gangsta Rap"

64:00 - SOLVED:  Why our timer never works.. (chris's fault)