What are you actually supposed to DO during sex?

Seriously.

Where do your hands go? How do you tell someone what you actually like? What if you can't orgasm with your partner? What if you want to bring a toy into the bedroom? And what happens when you want sex way more than the person you're with?

This week on Unfiltered with Jules, we're going fully Between the Sheets for one of our most honest, adult conversations yet.

So pour the wine, put on the headphones, and get comfortable.

Because somehowwe're expected to magically know how to be “good in bed” without anyone ever teaching us what good sex actually looks like.

Spoiler: it'sprobably a lot less about technique than you think.

We're getting into:

🔥 Arousal and why attraction doesn't always meanyou're instantly ready for sex

🔥 Foreplay, anticipation, and why we need to stop treating it like the opening act

🔥 Orgasms, performance anxiety, and the pressure tofinish

🔥 Why people fake orgasms and how that can backfire

🔥 Masturbation, solo pleasure, and actually learning your own body

🔥 Sexual confidence and getting out of your own head

🔥 Why receiving pleasure can sometimes be harder than giving it

🔥 How to tell someone what feels good without making it awkward

🔥 Sex toys, bringing them into a relationship, and why they aren't competition

🔥 Spontaneous vs. responsive desire

🔥 Mismatched sex drives and what happens when one partner wants sex more

🔥 Affection without expectation

🔥 Sexual compatibility in long-term relationships

🔥 Keeping sex interesting without turning your bedroom into Cirque du Soleil

🔥 And the things we seriously need to STOP doing in bed

Plus, we'reanswering three listener questions throughout the episode:

💌 “I can orgasm alone, so why can't I finish with my boyfriend?”

💌 “I know what I like, but why am I so embarrassed to tell my partner?”

💌 “I want sex way more than my partner does. How are we supposed to compromise without either of us feeling pressured or rejected?”

And because we'reall adults here, I'm opening something new this week:

🧸 THE UNFILTERED TOY BOX

I love toys myself, and there is absolutely no judgment around here. So if you've ever opened a toy website, looked at approximately 900 options and thought, “What the FUCK am I supposed to buy?”... I did some homework for you.

Here are the toys mentioned in this week's episode:

THE UNFILTERED TOY BOX — SHOP THE EPISODE

• plusOne Vibrating Bullet: https://myplusone.com/products/plusone-vibrating-bullet

• Maude Vibe: https://getmaude.com/

• Dame Pom: https://dame.com/collections/external-vibrators

• Dame Eva: https://dame.com/collections/external-vibrators

• We-Vibe Moxie+: https://www.we-vibe.com/us/moxie-plus

• We-Vibe Chorus: https://www.we-vibe.com/us/chorus

• We-Vibe Melt 2: https://www.we-vibe.com/us/melt-2

And toward the end, I'm giving you My Unfiltered Take on what being “good in bed” actually means.

Because great sexisn't about performing.

It isn't about knowing fifty positions.

It isn't about magically reading somebody's mind.

And an orgasm isn'ta fucking report card.

Great sex is about curiosity, communication, safety, confidence, attention, pleasure, and being willing to actually learn each other.

Nobody handed us thefucking instruction manual.

Solet's talk about it. 🖤

🎧Unfiltered with Jules

New episodes every Tuesday.

Have a dating, relationship, sex, friendship, or life question you want me to answer? Submit your story anonymously through Unfiltered with Jules.

And for early and ad-free episodes, unedited voice notes, monthly live Q&As, our private community, first access to live tapings, the archive, and conversations that don't always belong on the public internet, come join us inside The Love Lounge.
https://discord.gg/yrVAz9TaSV

Explicit episode. Listener discretion advised.

xo, Jules

Have you ever looked at a red flag, acknowledged the red flag, discussed the red flag with your friends… and then decided it wasn’t that serious because the person holding it was ridiculously hot?

Yeah. We need to talk. 😂

In this episode of Unfiltered with Jules, we’re getting brutally honest about what happens when attraction starts negotiating our standards.

Because sometimes he’s not mysterious. He’s inconsistent. He’s not protective. He’s controlling. He’s not emotionally complicated. He’s emotionally unavailable. And sometimes we’re not missing the red flags at all. We’re seeing them perfectly clearly and then becoming Olympic-level translators trying to explain them away.

Jules breaks down the difference between chemistry and compatibility, why jealousy can get mistaken for passion, why possessiveness isn’t automatically protection, and why hot-and-cold behavior can feel so intoxicating even when it’s making you anxious as hell.

We’re also talking about the red flag translation dictionary:

🚩 “He’s jealous because he cares.”

🚩 “He’s just complicated.”

🚩 “He needs time.”

🚩 “He’s amazing when it’s just us.”

🚩 “He’ll change when…”

And then there’s the big one: potential.

Because potential is sexy as hell when it gives you something to wait for. But are you actually dating who someone is, or are you dating the version of them you’ve imagined they’ll eventually become?

Jules also gets into the difference between a flaw and a pattern, why your friends might see something you’re refusing to see, and how to tell whether you’re defending your relationship because it’s actually healthy or because you desperately want it to be.

Plus, your listener questions:

💌 What’s a red flag you ignored because you were attracted to someone?

💌 What do you do when your friends hate your boyfriend but you don’t see what they see?

💌 How much bad behavior is too much when someone is incredible the rest of the time?

And here’s the question I really want you to sit with:

If you weren’t attracted to this person, would you still think their behavior was acceptable?

Because you don’t have to stop loving someone before you can admit they’re wrong for you. You don’t have to turn someone into a villain to justify walking away. And you definitely don’t have to wait until a red flag comes with a marching band behind it before you take it seriously.

So grab your coffee, your wine, or whatever questionable decision-making beverage you’re currently holding… and let’s talk about why sometimes a pretty face gets way too much negotiating power.

Follow Unfiltered with Jules, share this episode with the friend who’s currently dating a walking red flag and insisting he’s just misunderstood, and send me your stories and questions through the website.

Because apparently none of us are running out of questionable relationship decisions anytime soon. 😂

Trust your gut. Pay attention to patterns. And for the love of God, stop letting a pretty face negotiate your standards.

Bye, bitch. 💋

Can you love someone deeply… and still not actually like being around them anymore?

Not because they cheated. Not because they’re a terrible person. Not because there’s some giant, obvious reason everyone can point to and say, “Yep, that’s why you should leave.”

Maybe they’re a good person. Maybe you’ve built a life together. Maybe everything is technically fine.

And somehow… you’re still unhappy.

In this episode of Unfiltered with Jules, we’re getting brutally honest about what happens when love and compatibility stop feeling like the same thing.

We’re talking about:

🖤 The difference between loving your partner and actually liking them
🖤 When a relationship starts feeling more like a roommate situation
🖤 How to tell the difference between a rough patch and something deeper
🖤 Resentment, emotional disconnection, and losing curiosity about each other
🖤 Whether you actually miss your partner… or just miss who you used to be together
🖤 What happens when you realize you don’t like the person you’ve become inside the relationship
🖤 The uncomfortable five-year question: If nothing changed, would you still choose this life?
🖤 What it means when imagining life without your partner feels more like relief than fear
🖤 Whether a relationship can be rebuilt when the connection is gone
🖤 And the hardest question of all: Do I actually want this relationship anymore?

Plus, we’re answering listener questions about loving someone you no longer enjoy being around, figuring out whether you’ve fallen out of love, and leaving a genuinely good person when you’re simply no longer happy.

Because sometimes you don’t need a villain.

Sometimes you need honesty.

So grab your headphones, get comfortable, and ask yourself the question we’re starting with today:

Do you actually like your partner?

Welcome back, bitch. 🖤

Have you ever noticed one weird thing your partner did and, fourteen seconds later, your brain had written an entire Netflix series about it? 😂

A deleted text. A phone turned face down. A new follower. A late-night Instagram notification. Suddenly you’re connecting dots that may or may not even exist.

But what happens when the story we’re telling ourselves becomes more powerful than what we actually know?

This week, we’re getting into deleted messages, social media, privacy vs. secrecy, open-phone relationships, situationships, relationship detectives, intuition vs. anxiety, resentment, and that gut-punch feeling of dreading coming home.

Because sometimes your partner really is hiding something.

And sometimes your brain is filling in the blanks.

The hard part is figuring out which one you’re dealing with.

We’re also answering listener questions about deleted messages, secretly checking a partner’s phone, and a hidden Instagram conversation with someone from the past.

And then we’re going a little deeper:

What if the phone isn’t actually the problem?

What if the deleted message is just the thing that exposed everything underneath it?

Your homework this week is simple:

What story are you telling yourself about your partner?

What do you actually know?

And have you actually talked to them about it?

Because you can’t build a healthy relationship around surveillance.

And you can’t build one around secrecy either.

🖤 THE LOVE LOUNGE IS OFFICIALLY OPEN.

It’s our free community for the conversations that don’t always fit into an episode. Relationships, dating, friendship, family, sex, real life, bad decisions, hard questions, and everything in between.

Be one of the first through the door and you’ll become a Founding Member with a special badge on your profile.

Come pull up a chair.

Join The Love Lounge at

https://thelovelounge.discourse.group

And if you’ve got a story of your own, you already know what to do. Keep the names out, keep yourself anonymous, and tell me the messy version. 🎙️💋

Do you have a high sex drive, or do you feel like your sexual urges are running the show?

This week’s anonymous submission takes us into some pretty uncomfortable territory: constant sexual thoughts, compulsive behavior, masturbation at work, saying yes when you don’t actually feel like you can say no, and eventually realizing, “Something isn’t right here.”

But this conversation isn’t about judging how much sex someone has.

It’s about choice, control, boundaries, validation, and knowing when a behavior is actually starting to interfere with your life.

We talk about the difference between having a high libido and feeling like you can’t control your behavior, what might be underneath compulsive sexual patterns, and why you don’t have to hate your sexuality to regain control of it.

And, as always, we’re getting very unfiltered about it.

Welcome back, bitch.

Have you ever found yourself dating someone for who you know they could be instead of who they actually are? This week, we’re talking about the trap of dating someone’s potential, why we confuse promises with progress, chemistry with consistency, and how long we can realistically wait for someone to become the person we’ve been hoping for. Because at some point, you have to ask yourself: if they never changed, would you still choose this relationship?

What happens when you look around one day and realize you’ve slowly disappeared from your own life? In this first episode back, Jules talks about losing yourself in relationships, routines, responsibilities, and comfort — and why finding yourself again doesn’t necessarily mean blowing up your entire life. Sometimes you don’t need a reinvention. You just need a reconnection with yourself.

That’s right I’m back! I hope you missed me! Today we are talking the bare minimum and foreplay. Buckle up, you guys sent me some good ones for this weeks big return episode!

This week on Unfiltered with Jules, we’re diving into the wild, the chaotic, and the downright cringe. From the texts we regret to the nights we barely survived, I’m unpacking those “I can’t believe I did that” moments—both in the bedroom and on a date. With five spicy mini segments and listener stories that will have you screaming, laughing, and texting your best friend immediately… this is one you need in your ears.

This week, we’re getting unfiltered in all the right (and wrong) places. From texting games and dry foreplay to wild next-morning regrets, I’m diving into why the bare minimum in bed just isn’t cutting it anymore. You sent in your most unhinged sex stories—and I brought them straight to the mic. So if you’ve ever faked it, regretted it, or screamed for all the wrong reasons… this one’s for you.