We’ve all heard the phrase “jumping to conclusions,” but have we really stopped to think about how that jumping happens? It’s a phenomenon that we’ve all experienced: We see something, our brains quickly search for evidence that supports or refutes what we see, and we draw a conclusion. All of this happens in a split second, without even being conscious of it. The end result is often an assumption, which can lead to misunderstandings, communication breakdowns, or worse. Our question this episode: how can understanding our thought processes help us manage conflict? We look at the Ladder of Inference as a tool to shed light on how we move from reality to beliefs to action. Hosted by Beth Buelow, PCC. More information at howcanisaythis.com. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Using the Ladder of Inference to Reframe Conflict

The “How Can I Say This…” podcast offers tips and advice for interpersonal communications challenges, such as difficult conversations, conflict, giving and receiving feedback, negotiating, and other situations where what you say and how you say it makes all the difference.
Your host is Beth Buelow, PCC,&nbsp;founder of&nbsp;ZOPA Consulting&nbsp;and author of “The Introvert Entrepreneur: Amplify Your Strengths and Create Success on Your Own Terms.” Beth’s credentialed professional coach and trained mediator. She loves finding the “Zone of Possible Agreement” (ZOPA!) in any situation that comes her way. She hosted&nbsp;The Introvert Entrepreneur Podcast from 2010-2018.
In every episode of "How Can I Say This...", you’ll find ideas about how to handle your communication conundrums; tips on feeling more confident and comfortable with conflict; opportunities to learn from real-life situations through questions shared by listeners; and ultimately, gain skills and techniques for dealing with sticky situations at work and home. Of course, we can’t be all talk and no action;&nbsp;each show will end with an invitation to try a particular technique or approach that came up in the episode.
Episodes will feature a mixture of commentary, listener questions, and expert guest interviews and contributions. The scope of conversation will evolve over time… we’re open to seeing where this goes. Thanks for joining us on the journey! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Self-Improvement

As the vintage advertising for Virginia Slims cigarettes told women, you’ve come a long way, baby. Women have carved out a bigger seat at the table over the past 70 years. But we still have challenges when it comes to our voices being heard.
Our question this episode: How can women claim their space through confident communication that also builds relationship? 
My guest is Eliza VanCort, author of “A Woman's Guide to Claiming Space: Stand Tall. Raise Your Voice. Be Heard.” This is an episode for women AND men who want to support the women in their lives!
Hosted by Beth Buelow, PCC. More info and archives at www.howcanisaythis.com. Your ratings, reviews, and shares are appreciated. Thanks so much for listening! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Claiming Space with Eliza VanCort

There are lots of things that get in the way of our ability to successfully handle conflict. They often have to do with a limiting mindset, a leaning towards people pleasing, misidentifying the root cause of the conflict, or not creating a safe environment for feedback or different opinions. The good news is that there’s a lot we can personally do to remove those barriers. 
Our question this episode: What are some simple but powerful ways we can set ourselves up for better success when we get into conflict?
My guest is Alan Heymann. Alan is a leadership and executive coach in the Washington DC area. He’s a communications and marketing veteran from the media, government, and nonprofit sectors, with degrees in journalism and law. He’s worn many hats, including being a reporter, anchor, editor and producer, spokesperson, business owner, activist and team leader. His entire career has focused on doing good in the world, by helping others grow. 
Hosted by Beth Buelow, PCC. More information and episode archives at www.howcanisaythis.com. Your reviews, ratings, and shares are appreciated! Thanks for listening and caring about courageous conversations. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Pausing and People Pleasing with Alan Heymann

Whether we’re aware of it or not, the past year has introduced most everyone to a new language. Words that we used in one context, such as equality, equity, diversity, belonging, and systems, are now taking on new meaning and are being used in new contexts. It’s not always easy to keep up, but for the sake of courageous conversations, it’s important we try. Our question this episode: how do we talk respectfully and directly about matters of race and privilege when we’re still learning the vocabulary?
My guest today is Arlene Koth, Founder of OPC Consulting. Arlene has over two decades of HR management and organizational planning experience, nearly 20 years of nonprofit experience, and 15 years of C-suite/executive leadership experience. 
How Can I Say This… is hosted by Beth L. Buelow, PCC. More info and archives at howcanisaythis.com. Thank you for listening! Your shares, reviews and ratings are welcome.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The Language of DEI with Arlene Koth

We spend a lot of time thinking about how to have conversations with people we care about. After all, these are the relationships that have the biggest influence in our lives. But what if we spent as much time thinking about the conversations we have with strangers? Could there be new experiences we’re missing out on that would enrich our lives? 
Our question this episode: how do you start a conversation with a stranger that might serve as a lead-in to friendship?
If you enjoy this episode, please share with friends, family and colleagues! Your reviews, ratings and subscriptions are also appreciated. Learn more about the podcast, read a transcript of this episode, and access the archives at howcanisaythis.com. Thanks so much for listening! ~Beth B.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

How to Talk to Strangers (Listener Question)

It’s a reflexive question most of us ask when we start a conversation, and it’s one of the easiest and most challenging questions to answer: how are you? Every time it comes up, I find myself hesitating just a little. This is especially true in the past year, when it feels like an extremely loaded question. 
Our question this episode: how far do you go when you answer, “how are you?”
Hosted by Beth L. Buelow. Full episode transcript is available at howcanisaythis.com. Your reviews, ratings, and shares are welcome! If you have a listener question you’d like to have addressed in a future episode, use the submission form at howcanisaythis.com. Thanks for listening! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Using the Ladder of Inference to Reframe Conflict

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