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Vag-eye-na
A boy looks up at his father in search of answers, and the father hears him but does not see him, for his eyes are locked on the turned back of the man who had just saved them. The man was trying his best to flee down the trash-alley and to the east, out of sight, but his progress was halted every few meters or so, in order to catch his breath and tame his eclectic collection of coughs and wheezes.
“But Dad he’s a hero!” Says the little boy, “He saved us from Cinema Robert’s awful posts!”
The father nods slowly still gazing at their savior, who stands doubled over with one hand against the alley wall, hacking up some phlegm. “I know son...” The father says.
“But why is he running away Dad?”, Asks the boy, as their savior pulls out his inhaler.
“Because we have to chase him..” The father says and as soon as the words leave his lips, buzzing on the western wind a smattering of angry voices pierce their ears. Under his breath, the savior swears and attempts to hasten his egress, the intense effort of such an undertaking apparent in his high frequency of breath, and frantic pumping of arms: traditional signifiers of immense athletic output, now at conflict with the reality of his pace. The little boy looks nervously in the direction of the voices, “But he didn’t do anything wrong!” He says. The father nods and takes a moment to close his eyes as their savior finally rounds the corner and disappears. The father then kneels eye-to-eye with his son as loose kernels of asphalt dance to the rumble of stampeding feet and says, “Because he’s the hero Twitter deserves but not the one it needs right now..” And then the father quickly pulls his son into a crouched embrace, shielding him from the swell of angry mob that rushes past them, pitchforks and torches holding up the sky. “He went through the alley!” A mob voice shouts, “Lets get that Grandma hater!” another shouts, “Racist!” adds one more, and when the mob finally clears the father releases his son, and concludes the hardest lesson the boy will ever learn, “And so we’ll hunt him..” The father says, “Because he can take it, because he’s not our hero. He’s a silent guardian, a watchful poster...A Jack Allison.”
Topics discussed on today's show include: Vag-eye-na, Jack & M*v*e B*B, Who’s Running...A Great Campaign?, Epstein Theories, and phone calls from the Slurpfam!
Episode originally aired live on Twitch on Thursday12/05/19 - VOD link for this episode here:
https://www.twitch.tv/videos/517403811
Buy JackAM merch: https://jackam.tv/shop/
Donate to JackAM!: https://streamelements.com/jackam/tip
Don’t forget to watch Caits episode of Unikitty, set to premiere on Cartoon Network December 24th!
View all episodes
By JackAM
4.9
6060 ratings
A boy looks up at his father in search of answers, and the father hears him but does not see him, for his eyes are locked on the turned back of the man who had just saved them. The man was trying his best to flee down the trash-alley and to the east, out of sight, but his progress was halted every few meters or so, in order to catch his breath and tame his eclectic collection of coughs and wheezes.
“But Dad he’s a hero!” Says the little boy, “He saved us from Cinema Robert’s awful posts!”
The father nods slowly still gazing at their savior, who stands doubled over with one hand against the alley wall, hacking up some phlegm. “I know son...” The father says.
“But why is he running away Dad?”, Asks the boy, as their savior pulls out his inhaler.
“Because we have to chase him..” The father says and as soon as the words leave his lips, buzzing on the western wind a smattering of angry voices pierce their ears. Under his breath, the savior swears and attempts to hasten his egress, the intense effort of such an undertaking apparent in his high frequency of breath, and frantic pumping of arms: traditional signifiers of immense athletic output, now at conflict with the reality of his pace. The little boy looks nervously in the direction of the voices, “But he didn’t do anything wrong!” He says. The father nods and takes a moment to close his eyes as their savior finally rounds the corner and disappears. The father then kneels eye-to-eye with his son as loose kernels of asphalt dance to the rumble of stampeding feet and says, “Because he’s the hero Twitter deserves but not the one it needs right now..” And then the father quickly pulls his son into a crouched embrace, shielding him from the swell of angry mob that rushes past them, pitchforks and torches holding up the sky. “He went through the alley!” A mob voice shouts, “Lets get that Grandma hater!” another shouts, “Racist!” adds one more, and when the mob finally clears the father releases his son, and concludes the hardest lesson the boy will ever learn, “And so we’ll hunt him..” The father says, “Because he can take it, because he’s not our hero. He’s a silent guardian, a watchful poster...A Jack Allison.”
Topics discussed on today's show include: Vag-eye-na, Jack & M*v*e B*B, Who’s Running...A Great Campaign?, Epstein Theories, and phone calls from the Slurpfam!
Episode originally aired live on Twitch on Thursday12/05/19 - VOD link for this episode here:
https://www.twitch.tv/videos/517403811
Buy JackAM merch: https://jackam.tv/shop/
Donate to JackAM!: https://streamelements.com/jackam/tip
Don’t forget to watch Caits episode of Unikitty, set to premiere on Cartoon Network December 24th!