For the first episode of DWTS's third season, Katy and Chris are back in fine form.  There is a love for the female pros (especially Cheryl, Edyta, and Kym Legs-for-Days Johnson).  There is a distaste for sob story packages, especially involving bus accidents.  There are Emmitt Smith hot taeks.  There are disappointments and surprises galore.  There is a general thirsting over hot people.  Just an ordinary day back on Planet Mirrorballus.

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Podcast art: Kat Fey

Music: "Mister Capone" by Alex Khaskin