More Will Be Revealed

Was it love, or codependency?


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In this episode I share intimate details of my previous 6.5 year relationship: how I felt during that time, how I behaved in order to maintain the stability of the relationship, what happened when I started taking responsibility for myself, and where I am today with my current partner. 


Episode breakdown:

  • In my early 20s I believed my relationship was great because we’d been together for many years, didn’t have conflicts or arguments, and had regular sex.
  • I believed I loved my ex-boyfriend because I longed to be with him when we were apart.
  • In truth, the relationship lacked intimacy and I was desperate for any shred of affection.
  • We didn’t have the ability to be honest with ourselves, or with each other.
  • The relationship gave me a sense of safety that I believe I needed to survive a difficult period in my early 20s.
  • In 12 Step recovery I became aware of my codependent behaviours.
  • When I began taking responsibility for my needs and my boundaries, my self-esteem improved and I learnt to be ok in my own company.
  • When I changed, the relationship dynamic no longer functioned, and we broke up.
  • Three weeks later I felt a new sense of freedom and was glad to move on.
  • I was single for 6 years, during which I learnt to be ok on my own, discovered who I truly was and what I wanted in life and in a relationship.
  • My self-worth was at an all time high when I met my current boyfriend. I was able to communicate honestly with him, and today we are in a deeply intimate, loving and supportive relationship that continues to evolve day by day.

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If you resonate with this episode, or have any questions about my story or my recovery, I’d love to hear from you! Send me an email at [email protected]


Love Josephine


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More Will Be RevealedBy Josephine Muttray