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We Moved In Together. Now Who Does What?
Some people look at living together before marriage is a "test" to see if both of you are compatible. However, this can be an expensive experience. From signing names on the lease to buying furniture together. According to Institute for Family Studies, today most couples live together before marriage. More than 75% You can test a person without moving in together to see if you two are compatible.
Example: take a trip together. You will find out so much about that person from communication to decision making. Why move in with your significant other without your name on the lease? Some people believe living together before marriage will save money because all the finances goes under one roof instead of paying rent in two different places. Sometimes you might want to break up with that person but you can't because you both live together. You've invested in a long term relationship that ended too early. If most people live paycheck to paycheck, you don't have any money to move if you wanted to. The only options you have is moving with friends or family. It's easier to break a relationship if both of you are living independently.
Living together may instill a break up mentality that can hurt marriage later. Why? You're used to ending relationships with a "what if" mentality (when living together) "what will I do if we break up?" Getting married says "we have to follow through with commitment." A word that's foreign when it comes to relationships. You're used to moving out and moving on, but in marriage it isn't that easy. If you are used to breaking relationships, over time it erodes your trust, making marriage a scary thing.
If you move in together, now who does what? Have the conversation about expectations. Who is going to do what from trash, dishes, laundry, finances, etc. What about kids? Especially if they are young. Who will pick them up from daycare? What will family time look like? Who's helping the kids with homework? Last but not least, have the conversation about if the relationship does not work, then what? Do you save money on the side? Who will stay if one person decide to put the other person out?
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By Shon Hyneman
4.9
3535 ratings
Some people look at living together before marriage is a "test" to see if both of you are compatible. However, this can be an expensive experience. From signing names on the lease to buying furniture together. According to Institute for Family Studies, today most couples live together before marriage. More than 75% You can test a person without moving in together to see if you two are compatible.
Example: take a trip together. You will find out so much about that person from communication to decision making. Why move in with your significant other without your name on the lease? Some people believe living together before marriage will save money because all the finances goes under one roof instead of paying rent in two different places. Sometimes you might want to break up with that person but you can't because you both live together. You've invested in a long term relationship that ended too early. If most people live paycheck to paycheck, you don't have any money to move if you wanted to. The only options you have is moving with friends or family. It's easier to break a relationship if both of you are living independently.
Living together may instill a break up mentality that can hurt marriage later. Why? You're used to ending relationships with a "what if" mentality (when living together) "what will I do if we break up?" Getting married says "we have to follow through with commitment." A word that's foreign when it comes to relationships. You're used to moving out and moving on, but in marriage it isn't that easy. If you are used to breaking relationships, over time it erodes your trust, making marriage a scary thing.
If you move in together, now who does what? Have the conversation about expectations. Who is going to do what from trash, dishes, laundry, finances, etc. What about kids? Especially if they are young. Who will pick them up from daycare? What will family time look like? Who's helping the kids with homework? Last but not least, have the conversation about if the relationship does not work, then what? Do you save money on the side? Who will stay if one person decide to put the other person out?