There’s a secret happy people know. I would tell you what it is, but then you would have no reason to come to Blue Oaks on Sunday.

Join us this week as we study Philippians 2:1-11 and learn the secret happy people know.

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A couple comes into a lawyer’s office, and they want a divorce. They ask him to help them get a divorce.

But what’s unusual is they’re very elderly. In fact, they’re in their early 90s and they say, “We want a divorce.”

The lawyer says, “How long have you been married?”

They say, “We’ve been married for 70 years.”

He says, “70 years? Why are you in my office wanting a divorce now after 70 years?”

They say, “We wanted to wait until after the children died.”

Okay, that probably never happened.

If it did, that couple lived for a lot of years without joy.

You see, the reason joy is such an important thing in a marriage is because it is a very powerful emotion.

The psychiatrist William Frye from Stanford University spent many years studying the dramatic impact that laughter, humor, and happiness have on our lives.

He found that joy increases the pulse rate, increases the circulation of the blood, increases oxygenation.

If we could just get a calorie-burning effect, it would be a near-perfect emotion.

It causes remarkable relaxation. I’m sure you’ve all experienced that.

Have you ever been around a table with someone, and you’re just having so much fun you hate to leave the table because your body is so relaxed and you’re having such a good time?

William Frye says this from his research:

“Humor and anger cannot coexist. Joy defuses rage. Anger demands a serious attitude, but humor banishes the tightness and the severity necessary for anger. If joy is experienced, rage is impossible.” — William Frye

Joy is an incredibly powerful emotion that needs to be used more and better in our lives and relationships.

British author and journalist G. K. Chesterton, who often found himself in the role of court jester as he would bring opposing sides together using humor, said this:

“Despair does not lie in being weary of suffering but in being weary of joy.” — G. K. Chesterton

He says we’re all starved for joy.

And here’s the promise from the writers of Scripture — You can become a joyful person.

With God’s help it really is possible. It’s a learned skill.

God would not command it if it were not so.

But here’s the truth — you must take responsibility for your joy. You must take responsibility for your joy — not your friend, not your boss, not your parent, not your loved ones.

Your joy is your responsibility.

Periodically, I run across articles that instill guilt in me about things like, “Are you being intentional about saving up enough money for the end of your life?”

They’ll have little charts where you’re supposed to put so much money aside per month, and if you don’t do that, you’re going to end up on the streets.

Very rarely will you see an article that asks the question — are you invested enough in joy?

Are you setting aside enough joy every month so that when you get to the end of your life you’ll be able to look back on a full life.

I read an article that was written from a wife about her husband. She was reflecting on the fact that a day was coming up that was going to be very painful for her.

It’s the date her husband always said, “This is the day when I’m going to retire so I can enjoy my family.”

But he passed away three years earlier. So that date was approaching, and it was bringing her great pain — because he was waiting for the end of his life to make a commitment to pursue joy.

Now, for some of you, the pursuit and acquisition of joy will not be an easy thing.

Some of you in this room are joy-impaired; you are joy-challenged.

You’