Shame will tell you - dictate to you - that you must do everything flawlessly. If you don't, shame tells you, you're a failure. And shame like this is often tied to tremendous ridicule, judgment, criticism, micro expressions, nonverbal cues, that all say "You aren't enough." This gets etched into you then you take over, trying to satisfy shame with compensation. It will *never* work. You must get into the roots of shame and transmute that cycle.