In Genesis 2:18, God said, “It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helpmeet (helper)." What does the bible mean when it says the wife is the helpmeet? Read or listen to this material from Your Marriage God’s Way to learn the biblical definition of helpmeet.

Table of ContentsA Helpmeet (Helper) Comparable to HimGod as Our EzerThe Holy Spirit as Our HelperThe Commendable Nature of HelpingA Helpmeet (Helper) Suited to the HusbandHelping Is a Two-Way StreetWhat Does a Wife's Help Look Like Practically?Important Considerations for HelpmeetsDon’t Despise the Day of Small ThingsThe Virtuous Wife of Proverbs 31Three Threats to a Wife as a HelpmeetThreat One: Pursuit of WealthThreat Two: IdlenessThreat Three: Misplaced Self-WorthPraise for Such a Helpmeet

A Helpmeet (Helper) Comparable to Him

Some women might find it offensive to be identified as their husband’s “helpmeet,” but the title does not imply that Eve was insufficient in some way. Instead, the term “helpmeet” identifies Adam’s inadequacy! In the Amplified Bible, Genesis 2:18 reads, “The Lord God said, ‘It is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone.’” Woman is the helpmeet man needs because he is lacking without her. God created woman to remove man’s deficiency:

To call a woman a helpmeet is not to emphasize her weakness, but her strength. Not to label her as superfluous but as essential to Adam’s condition and to God’s purpose in the world. Helpmeet is a position of dignity given to the woman by God Himself.

Richard and Sharon Phillips, Holding Hands, Holding Hearts (Phillipsburg, NJ: Presbyterian & Reformed, 2006), 26-27.

The Hebrew word translated as “helpmeet” is ezer, and it means “help” or “one who helps.” The word occurs 21 times in the Old Testament, including twice in Genesis 2—first in verse 18, then again in verse 20 when Adam named the animals and could not find “a helpmeet comparable to him.” In the other 19 appearances, ezer is never used in a negative sense. The term doesn’t describe a sycophant, minion, or slave. Instead, it is used to describe great strength and support. Consider these verses:

“Happy are you, O Israel! Who is like you, a people saved by the Lord, the shield of your help [ezer] and the sword of your majesty!” (Deuteronomy 33:29).

“I will scatter to every wind all who are around him to help [ezer] him, and all his troops” (Ezekiel 12:14).

Considering these contexts, identifying a woman as her husband’s ezer reveals her as a powerful and influential companion.

God as Our Ezer

We see the word ezer used 11 times in the Psalms. Every time, it describes God as our helper. Some examples include:

“Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our help [ezer] and our shield” (Psalm 33:20).

“Make haste to me, O God! You are my help [ezer] and my deliverer” (Psalm 70:5).

“O Israel, trust in the Lord; He is their help [ezer] and their shield” (Psalm 115:9).

The very word used to describe a woman’s role is a title that describes God Himself! Because the identification of God as our helper does not make us think less of God, we should not let it think it diminishes a woman’s role as her husband’s helper.

The Holy Spirit as Our Helper

In the New Testament, Jesus used the title “Helper” for the Holy Spirit when He promised not to abandon the disciples after His departure:

“I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper” (John 14:16).

“The Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name…” (John 14:26).

“It is to your advantage that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you” (John 16:7).

What a privilege for women to carry the same title Jesus gave to the Holy Spirit! The title of ezer or helper is not one of inferiority but of honor.

The Commendable Nature of Helping

Biblically speaking, helping and serving are two of the most admirable actions we can engage in as Christians.