A parent who “doesn’t gamble” is, in fact, a gambler. Bringing human life into the world is the ultimate gamble with the highest possible stakes.

There are three reasons why it’s helpful to think of procreating as a high-stakes gamble:

1. It’s risky: between physical risks to the mother, mental and emotional health risks and the potential for kids to destroy relationships, it’s safe to say having kids is a risky bet.
2. The odds are not calculable: a human isn’t a mathematical equation whose output is a function of the input. The range of potential outcomes from having kids is infinite with an emotional spectrum of bliss to misery.
3. The outcome is uncertain: it’s a box of chocolates, and you never know what you’ll get!

When a woman is pregnant, she is said to be “expecting.” “Expecting” goes hand in hand with “accepting” the fact that having kids could bring devastating heartbreak as much as it could bring unbridled joy.

This episode breaks down four things I think people tell themselves before they place a wager in favor of parenting.