This episode is one of the most vulnerable I’ve ever shared.

I take you deep into the hidden cost of survival—what happens to the body, mind, and spirit when you grow up in a home where chaos, addiction, violence, and emotional neglect were your baseline. I share parts of my story I’ve never spoken this fully before: being the oldest sibling in a home filled with screaming and physical abuse, trying to protect my siblings, enduring trauma between the ages of 3 to 8, and later reliving those patterns in two emotionally volatile marriages.

This episode explores why rest—something so simple for others—can feel terrifying after trauma. We talk about how your nervous system wires itself to stay in survival mode and why true rest isn’t just about sleep or stillness. It’s about feeling safe enough to soften.

You’ll learn what happens in the body energetically, physically, and emotionally when it doesn’t feel safe to pause. I also offer a powerful somatic tool, a gentle shadow reflection, and a healing affirmation to begin the process of reconnecting with your peace.

If you’ve ever felt guilty for needing rest, or scared to slow down, this episode is for you.