When Staying Small Keeps You Stuck

There’s a version of you that learned early on how to disappear.

How to shrink.

How to make yourself small enough that no one would notice, small enough that you wouldn't be a target, small enough that your needs wouldn’t inconvenience anyone.

For many of us who grew up with trauma, especially under the rule of a narcissistic parent or in an environment where love was conditional, staying small was a survival strategy. It worked. But what helped you survive then is keeping you trapped now.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us.

_Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

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