CouplesTalk

When the wave meets the island : Unlocking Attachment Pt. 2


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In this episode of Couples Talk, Nick and Naomi delve into the complexities of attachment styles in relationships, focusing on the dynamics between different combinations of attachment styles, particularly the 'island' and 'wave' dynamics. They explore how understanding one's own attachment style can lead to personal growth and improved relationship satisfaction. The conversation emphasizes the importance of self-awareness, communication, and the journey towards secure attachment, providing relatable examples and practical tips for couples.

Takeaways

  • Attachment theory is fundamental to couples work.
  • Recognizing your own attachment style is crucial for growth.
  • Patterns in relationships often reflect attachment styles.
  • The island and wave dynamic can create a cycle of retreat and cling.
  • Self-awareness is key to improving relationship dynamics.
  • Insecure attachment can be worked on and improved over time.
  • Communication is essential for understanding each other's needs.
  • Two islands in a relationship may lead to silence and misunderstanding.
  • Wave-wave relationships can be intense and unstable.
  • Personal growth towards secure attachment is a lifelong journey.


00:00 Understanding Attachment Theory

05:02 The Journey Towards Earned Security

16:18 Exploring Island-Island Dynamics

22:24 Navigating Wave-Wave Relationships

28:25 The Dynamics of Relationship Conflicts

33:32 Navigating Emotional Dysregulation

40:24 Building Trust and Setting Boundaries

44:22 Looking Ahead: Moving Towards Secure Attachment

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--Please note: The content on CouplesTalk is for general educational and informational purposes only.

Neither Naomi, Nick or any guest is your psychotherapist. Engaging with our content does not create a therapist-client relationship. We cannot provide individual advice, diagnosis, or treatment via these platforms. Our online work has ethical limits.

This is not a crisis service. If you need personalised therapy or are in crisis, please seek a qualified local professional or emergency services. Your well-being is paramount.

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