Isn't it so true that when I feel uncomfortable about something, I've been conditioned, in our culture, in our society, to reach external to me to quash it, especially if I mention it and it makes others uncomfortable?

Isn't that true?

Isn't that what you've been taught?

Now that I recognize it, does it help or does it hinder?

Does it force me to deal with that which makes me feel uncomfortable?

Because now I'm aware of it, right? Am I still uncomfortable? Now that I'm aware that I'm uncomfortable? What is it that makes me uncomfortable?

What is it that acts as a provocation to reach external to me?

What is it that I'm seeking salvation from? Am I aware enough to take apart the word salvation?

Salvation, salve, to soothe. I need to soothe this cut that has cut me and caused me to bleed. —ation , action of Salvation.

I'm seeking that which is to soothe me. So what is it that I am seeking to soothe me? So why is it when I plant a seed in the ground, that me as a human, stands outside of it, waiting for it to grow, and when it doesn't grow fast enough, I'm seeking external to pour upon the seed to make it grow faster to satisfy me as a human?

When, if the human was not an equation, it would grow just fine. It is the human me that recognizes it's not growing when I want it to, when God is telling me, “Wait. Wait to emerge from the darkness into the light. You just wait, you will climb, you will be strong enough to climb to the light. You can't force it” because I don't know about you, but any time that anybody has forced upon me a belief of something without proof, then why am I believing you? 🎅🧑‍🎄🤶

I had to put my hand upon the hot coils of a stove to learn that it burned me. I'm just that stubborn.

I'm not going to believe you that you felt pain until I feel it myself and in that journey of seeking Salvation, the act of soothing me from that which is uncomfortable, I learned to evolve and grow. I'm still from the same seed that beats within my heart that spoke words of purpose to me before I was an apple 🍎before my father's 🧿 eye. But I am evolving from that which planted me originally. I learn from that, which makes me uncomfortable. That is how is how I learned lessons born of my very own mistakes.

But if I don't know if I don't recognize, if I'm not aware of my mistakes, where, as I've lived in an environment before, where it has conditioned me to believe that I deserve to tell you when you can grow, that I deserve to tell you how you're going to grow, and when you're going to grow, and how big you're going to grow, and I'm going to control it as if I am God and then God, our Father says, “Wait a minute now. It seems that you have forgotten where you have come from. and that I have to descend with my Angels full of Light, so that you can remember from that in which you have arrived,”but otherwise, I don't know what I don't know until I know with certainty, in the lesson that now I know, because I'm uncomfortable and I've never felt it before, and this must mean something.

So maybe I should just sit with it and deal with it, instead of trying to project it away from me, and learn of where I participated in the harm of m. Don't I love you enough to not make you feel the same pain and bleed from the same wounds that I did?

I can't deny from which I've came. I can't deny what has occurred to me. I can't deny the wounds that have cut me, but it doesn't mean when I recognize them that I turn around and I become the wounds for somebody else.

No.

God our Father says, “I gave birth to you because you were strong enough to withstand the storm of the harm done to you, and it is written upon your skin that becomes the scroll that I read as the deeds performed by you and to you upon your Recall to Heaven and that is a promise.”

Amen 🙏🏻

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