If you’ve ever looked at an aspect of your life and decided it was time to change…
and then felt stopped, paralyzed, and felt yourself fall back to old patterns,
to the point you have thought “why even bother,” then you might be surprised to
realize the Neuroscience behind why that is. 

You’ll want to understand this one… because not getting this right
is the difference between a life of your design,
vs a life of DUTY you were unconsciously born into.

Everyone wants change and upgrading in our relationships,
our health,
our connection to purpose,
and our sense of self worth….

because the quality of our lives depends on us adapting and changing
in times of change.

In order to change, we go through several stages in the Cycle of Change:

1) PRE-CONTEMPLATION:  This is the part of the change cycle where you don’t even know
there’s a problem that requires us to shift, adapt, change, or upgrade ourselves.
We don’t know what we don’t know.

For example: You might be feeling stuck in a relationship pattern, not knowing
why you have the same arguments, or keep dating the same person, until you
do my attachment-style quiz for example.  Then you find out your attachment style is
“Avoidant” for example, then you might say “oh well… that explains a lot lol”.

👆🏽 This person doesn’t see it as a problem yet and has zero intention on doing anything just yet.
But now they’re aware they need to address this if they want a different outcome in their lives, and might
soon find themselves in the 2nd phase of the cycle of change:

2)  CONTEMPLATION: This is when you realize you have the problem, but you haven’t yet
made any plans or preparation to do anything about it.  There’s no COMMITMENT TO TAKING ACTION. 

👆🏽 This individual needs to wait for something painful to arrive— painful enough that staying stuck there
is more costly to them than the going into an unchartered territory where the outcome isn’t certain…
and leave the “safety” of the familiar and take a risk.  Things unfortunately have to get to a place where
they don’t have another option.  For most of us, we have to have a wake-up call, like a relationship collapse,
or in my case— the police had to be threatened to get involved in order for there to be change.

3) PREPARATION:  This is often right after a wakeup call, where people fill out an application, or inquire or send me
questions and DM’s about what it looks like, what it will take, time, investment, getting the people around us
aware that we are going to be investing time and space in the development of inner resources, strength, skillsets
that bring security and stability. 

👆🏽 Those who get to this part of the change process get to see those who are supportive of your changes,
and those that become triggered by it, as it threatens to shed light on THEIR own lack of progress,  This may activate their
own insecurities, abandonment fears, and exposes jealousy, leaving others present to the
real life possibility of losing you if you leap too high and outgrown them.  Even though in an ideal world, everyone is supportive
and participates alongside you in your upgrades— but it’s just seldom the case.  Being discouraged sometimes by those who are
closest to us is a part of the process. Only those truly committed Cyclebreakers to the next stage, regardless of what others say:

4) ACTION:  This is when you start doing the new thing, getting the new guidance, signing up for the course, going back to school,
beginning the exercise program.

👆🏽At first this feels both scary and exhilarating.  Your nervous system ramps up in activation energy to gather the resources
to move forward in all aspects.

5) RELAPSE:  Not my fav word— let’s call it a “bump in the road” instead.  This is when the old patterns with certainty, return. 
It’s like your old self says “not too fast my friend, remember the good old days?” and you get triggered into an old pattern, a
familiar trauma response “fight/flight/freeze/fawn” and the shame kicks in and you feel like you’re back-sliding or the fear
and judgement of your emotions almost can convince you that this isn’t possible. 

👆🏽If you’re able to see this for what it is— a bump in the road, it gives you the resilience to step up and say “today is only day 1”
and start again.  Those that progress rapidly in life and expand and level up have learned a very important skill: 
TO CHANGE THE RELATIONSHIP TO THE RELAPSES, and return back with grace, like you do when you are
trying to meditate and notice yourself in your thoughts again…. letting them go once more, and returning back to intention. 
This progressive, healing relationship with our thoughts can be transferred to our “bumps in the road” as well. 

When we do, we go into the next phase, and each further “bump in the road” we might fall into isn’t FALLING BACKWARDS…
it’s SPIRALLING UPWARDS as we are different in the face of every trigger and challenge.

6) MAINTENANCE - This is where change has been sustained to the point where you’re now seeing new behaviors replacing the old.
For example, I noticed with my inner work, I started becoming less reactive, and open to feedback instead of dismissing any feedback
as “wrong” or invalidating it to protect my ego.

👆🏽This is the part where I love receiving DM’s from the spouses of my clients thanking me for the new person that they’re with.
More confident, more intuitive, more intimacy in the entire relationship, even with parents, siblings, and friends.

If you’ve been consuming and digesting my content and KNOW you are requiring an upgrade in your emotional well-being
so that you can have healthy relationships and better vibrance and life-force energy moving through you,
so you can PAY IT FORWARD for others in your community….

I’d love to hear from you and have you tell me exactly what you’re wanting to upgrade.

Where are you at?
Where would you love to be?

If you’re curious, you can apply to work with me and my team of somatic and cognitive experts who’ve DONE their work
and continue to change and adapt through every bump in the road, and to be a part of a community of high vibing folks
who want to break the cycle for their children and learn how to be better leaders in their work or business.

Or you can drop in at one of our upcoming events and see for yourself.

Either way, I’m here to let you know that you don’t have to do it alone…

And yet no one can do it for you.

If experiencing a sense of purpose while showing up as a more congruent and secure you sounds
exciting (but scary),

follow the link below and tell me more.

I’d love to hear what comes up for you.
Change isn’t easy, but it’s not impossible with the right commitment, community, and guide.

See you at the next perfect time.

Nima.
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Upcoming Masterclass "SHOULD I STAY OR GO?" Live Event (Every month)
If you’re stuck in limbo, in repetitive relationship patterns, same arguments, attracting the same patterns, and you want to gain the clarity, confidence, and Courage to create secure relationships

Upcoming Overview Experience Virtual Event (Every month)
Dissolve your current relationship resentment, heal your attachment wounds, resolve your past and bring clarity to your next step.

Or if you are wanting to