I’ve tried very hard not to be offensive to anyone. I have made confession of my lack of Faith when we really needed it. It is so scary to anyone when they began to thin, as I did, what if I am wrong" That's called doubt.
"Why is faith so hard?"
There is a hiddenness to God that is both genius and infuriating. His hiddenness can either leave us in crippling doubt or cause us to seek harder after Him.
Why is faith so hard? There are obviously a million reasons, but I think a major reason we so often struggle with trusting God (which is what faith really is) is because trusting Him requires us to stop trusting ourselves. Trusting God means we are required to relinquish control of others. And in a world that sometimes feels like it's spinning out of control, we want nothing more than to take hold of something and bend it to our will so that at least we can be lord over something in our life.