We all need to set a boundary or two at various points in our lives. But, how do you go about it? Do you communicate your needs and feelings clearly? Or do you throw unsuccessful hints, hoping that the other person quietly picks up on your discomfort and unease? While knowing your boundaries is powerful, setting and then enforcing them clearly and with consideration is a whole different equation.

In this episode, Robert shares a particularly relatable example of someone who wasn't able to express her needs but then began resenting her loved one for not understanding. All the while, she maintained that she was not sharing her challenges directly because she didn't want to be unkind. Sometimes, when it comes to the people we love, we may let them play fast and loose with our feelings while they avoid our boundaries. We may do this consciously or unconsciously, not knowing how to reinforce our boundaries to protect ourselves or not realizing that we're encouraging their behavior by not putting a stop to it. Instead, learn how to ask yourself questions like, "How can I best take care of myself today?" Of course it then requires a sincere and contemplative response. Then, you'll be able to take a step back to evaluate challenging situations without difficult emotions clouding your ability to clearly state what you need and express the limits that need to be considered.

Before reacting defensively, take a moment to gather yourself and go back to your guiding questions. This can also help you lessen or eliminate saying something you'd regret while maximizing the chance to set clear boundaries and maintain a healthy relationship with the person. Try not to judge yourself or be too harsh as you figure out your feelings and needs because you're making your best efforts, no matter your level of awareness or development. That's what's important.

Tapping into your wisdom guidance at this time will help you gain insight into your reactions and also help you see vulnerable feelings underneath — hurt, fear, or pain. This awareness helps keep you grounded and enables you to move toward healing and happiness after you pinpoint what you need from yourself and express it to the person in front of you.

Read the transcription and listen to this episode at Awareness That Heals.