What is going on when our children seem judgmental of some of the things we do? As parents, we act as mirrors to them, just as they are reflections for us. It is uncomfortable to be at the receiving end of their projections but we need to keep in mind that this is not about us, as much as it feels that way, but it is about what our children have learned to disown; and we may even have taught them to disown that particular trait or energy.

Disowned parts we haven’t integrated can also show up again in our adult relationships, for example when we find that our partner reminds us of our father or mother.