We often feel frustrated trying to forgive ourselves and others in difficult times. We question why forgiveness is necessary if an offender does not deserve it; another question is when to forgive. It is necessary to move knowingly through the process of forgiveness. If we forgive prematurely, we lose the chance to “digest” our experience, and we cannot learn or share or grow. Difficult experiences often awaken us to become more conscious and self-aware, and this is a great gift of forgiving. Holding onto resentment for too long, however, may invite trouble into our lives and even change who we are or want to be. Our unwillingness to forgive—that is, emotional hostility or anger—can lead energy to fall within us. The longer we continue in this state, the more difficult it is to grow through the experience. But it is possible to make an emotional U-turn. If you are activated in anger or resentment today, look for the gift in the difficulty. It will likely be a slow journey toward forgiving the person that offended you, however a small leak in the barrier to your emotions may result in a flood of realization, opening the way to forgiveness and growth!