The Sandler Training Hour

Why Your Sales Conversations End in Assumptions Instead of Agreements


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You walk out of a first meeting and something nags at you. Was that person being straight with you? You have no evidence either way, so you fill the gap with a guess. Your prospect is doing the same thing about you.

This week we get into clarity, and what happens to a sales relationship when nobody asks for it. When you stop questioning what someone says, you start reading into what they don't say. Suspicion builds on both sides, neither person names it, and the deal stalls for reasons that never make it into the CRM.

Topicality: define the terms before you argue the substance
Jason brings in a rule from high school debate. Before you touch the substance of an argument, you define the terms. Get loose with a definition and you can spend an hour taking positions that never touch what the conversation was actually about. Sales calls run the same way. Two people say "budget" or "decision" or "next steps" and mean four different things.

Be impeccable with your word
Jim pulls the first of The Four Agreements into the conversation and adds the working translation: the goal is not the message you mean to send, it's the message the other person receives. That means translating Jim speak into Jason speak. Behavior style, background, how they think. The more you know about the person, the more precise your words can get.

Two people, two scripts
Every conversation is two accumulated scripts running at each other. Autopilot is easier, and staying present all day will exhaust you. In sales those scripts were built as a means to an end, and that is exactly what makes a salesperson feel salesy. Nobody wants to be sold. People do need help buying.

Taking the push out
Jim walks through leading the witness, and why a strong personality type gets more persuasive in their own head and more pushy in everyone else's. His counterweight: you're an expert on your subject matter, not an expert on the person across from you. From there we get into negative reverse selling as a way to remove the push entirely.

Suspicion is a bad foundation
Two people trying to build a relationship while quietly suspecting each other end up with a bad relationship and a set of assumptions they carry into the next one. Asking clarifying questions before you agree to anything protects both of you.

The takeaway Jason lands on at the close: if you want clarity from other people, be clear yourself, and get comfortable with them asking you for it.

The Sandler Training Hour Hosted by Jim & Jason Stephens | Crossroads Business Development

Join hosts Jim and Jason Stephens from Crossroads Business Development as they discuss techniques, tactics, and the occasional tangent associated with the Sandler Selling System. Whether you are prospecting, negotiating, or closing, The Sandler Training Hour gives you the actionable advice you need to stop "winging it" and start controlling the sale.

📧 Reach out: [email protected] 🌐 Crossroads Business Development

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The Sandler Training HourBy Jim Stephens