Wondering About...

Self-Reflection vs. Self-Criticism | Featuring Caitlin Lorsung

How do we learn from our mistakes without beating ourselves up in the process? In this episode of Wondering About..., we’re joined by Caitlin Lorsung to explore the difference between healthy self-reflection and the kind of self-criticism that leaves us feeling like we’re never quite good enough.

Together, we’ll talk about how to recognize when honest reflection turns into negative self-talk, why we can be so much harder on ourselves than we are on others, and how to approach our mistakes, shortcomings, and struggles with more curiosity and compassion.

Because growth doesn’t have to come from tearing ourselves down. What if we could learn to hold ourselves accountable while still giving ourselves grace?

Join us as we wonder about how to quiet our inner critic, embrace self-awareness, and learn to treat ourselves with the same kindness we so freely offer others.

Links to Documents/Support:

Nonjudgmental_Stance: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1vwHVXg4mJT9gQrUvQqKGDAAw9YeHWxkE/view?usp=sharing

DBT Common Thinking Mistakes: https://drive.google.com/file/d/19ygBZ5eW0HRodLWlDZaubO2OYFGJuNNc/view?usp=sharing

ITIWJM_Worksheet: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1fC4YTbzFgGvA9pjCsJale2ayi-9_c0i3/view?usp=sharing

Group Texts: The Good, The Bad, and the Never-Ending Notifications

We all have them — the group texts that keep us connected, make us laugh until we cry, and sometimes make us want to throw our phones across the room. 😂

In this episode of Wondering About..., we’re talking all things group texts. From the friendships and family connections they help us maintain to the endless notifications, misunderstood messages, and the pressure to keep up with every conversation. Are group texts making us feel more connected, or are they adding one more thing to our already busy lives?

Join us as we share our own experiences, laugh about the unspoken rules of group chats, and wonder why something as simple as a text thread can bring so much joy, confusion, and occasionally, drama.

So, are you the person who responds to every message, the one who silently reads everything, or the one who has 147 unread texts and absolutely no intention of catching up?

Come wonder with us! Because life is complicated enough — and sometimes the group chat makes it even more interesting.

Have you ever thought, “I should really learn another language”…and then wondered if your brain is a little too old for that?

In this episode of Wondering About, we’re diving into what it actually takes to learn a new language as an adult. Is there really a “best” age to learn? Do language-learning apps actually work? What happens in your brain when you learn another language? And can two midlife moms really become fluent—or at least learn enough to avoid embarrassing ourselves on vacation?

We did the research, looked at the science, and talked about what actually helps (and what might not) when learning a new language later in life.

NOTES:

ASL App- Lingvano - https://www.lingvano.com/asl

Citation:

American Council on the Teaching of Foreign Languages. (n.d.). The benefits of learning languages. ACTFL. https://www.actfl.org/advocacy-and-public-education/the-benefits-of-learning-languages

University of Haifa, "Bilinguals find it easier to learn a third language," ScienceDaily, www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2011/02/110201110915.htm, last accessed November 3, 2022.

Concordia University. "Bilingualism may maintain protection against Alzheimer's." ScienceDaily. ScienceDaily, 23 October 2024. .

Smith, D. G. (2018, May 4). At what age does our ability to learn a new language like a native speaker disappear? Scientific American

Joel. (2024, September 10). Do language learning apps actually work? ILAC.

NetLingo. (n.d.). Can you learn a language with an app: What the research says.

Why has everyone suddenly become obsessed with Korean skincare? From snail mucin and sheet masks to glass skin and the famous 10-step routine, K-beauty has become a global beauty phenomenon—but does all of it actually work?

In this episode of Wondering About…, we’re going down the K-beauty rabbit hole. We’ll look at how Korea became a powerhouse in the beauty industry, what makes Korean skincare different, and how K-pop, K-dramas and social media helped turn Korean beauty into a worldwide trend.

And then we ask the question we really want to know: Is K-beauty actually better, or are we just really good at selling ourselves the idea of perfect skin?

We'll talk about the science, the marketing, the consumer culture, and whether there's anything we should actually be adding to our own bathroom cabinets.

Because we're old enough to know better… but apparently still curious enough to think about putting snail slime on our faces.

Come wonder with us!

Alvarez, Gabriella V., et al. “Skincare Ingredients Recommended by Cosmetic Dermatologists: A Delphi Consensus Study.” Journal of the American Academy of Dermatology, vol. 93, no. 6, 2025, pp. 1509–1525.

Elsevier, https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jaad.2025.04.021.Bissett, D. L., et al. “Topical Niacinamide Reduces Yellowing, Wrinkling, Red Blotchiness, and Hyperpigmented Spots in Aging Facial Skin.” International Journal of Cosmetic Science, vol. 26, no. 5, 2004, pp. 231–238. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-2494.2004.00228.x.

Bravo, Bruna, et al. “Benefits of Topical Hyaluronic Acid for Skin Quality and Signs of Skin Aging: From Literature Review to Clinical Evidence.” Dermatologic Therapy, vol. 35, no. 12, 2022, e15903. https://doi.org/10.1111/dth.15903.Draelos, Zoe Diana, et al. “Efficacy Evaluation of a Topical Hyaluronic Acid Serum in Facial Photoaging.” Dermatology and Therapy, vol. 11, no. 4, 2021, pp. 1385–1394. https://doi.org/10.1007/s13555-021-00566-0.

Huang, Hsin-Yin, and Leon Tsung-Ju Lee. “Tretinoin for Photodamaged Facial Skin: Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis of Randomized Controlled Trials.” Dermatology Practical & Conceptual, vol. 15, no. 4, 2025, e20255172. https://doi.org/10.5826/dpc.1504a5172.

Jeon, Soeun. “The Rise of K-Beauty and the Economic Implications for South Korea.” Korea Economic Institute of America, 12 Jan. 2026, https://keia.org/analysis/the-rise-of-k-beauty-and-the-economic-implications-for-south-korea/.

Kwon, Yoo Jin. “Rituals and Myths of Korean Skin Care Practices: The Emergence of K-Beauty in the Global Marketplace.” Journal of the Korean Society of Costume, vol. 70, no. 5, 2020, pp. 45–61. https://doi.org/10.7233/jksc.2020.70.5.045.

Have you ever noticed that your period seems to sync up with your friends, roommates, sisters, or coworkers? Maybe you’ve even joked that you’ve been spending so much time together that your cycles decided to join forces.

But is period syncing actually a thing—or is it just one of those ideas we’ve all accepted without really questioning it?

In this episode of Wondering About..., we’re going down the rabbit hole of period syncing. Where did the idea come from? What does the research actually say? And why do so many people feel like they’ve experienced it?

We’re looking at the science behind menstrual cycles, the study that helped popularize the idea of menstrual synchrony, and what researchers have discovered since. Along the way, we’ll wonder about biology, coincidence, perception, and why our brains are so good at noticing patterns.

Is your period really syncing with your friends…or are we just really good at finding connections?

Come wonder with us.

Citations:

McClintock, Martha K. “Menstrual Synchrony and Suppression.” Nature, vol. 229, 1971, pp. 244–245. DOI: 10.1038/229244a0.

Wilson, H. Clyde, Sarah Hildebrandt Kiefhaber, and Virginia Gravel. “Two Studies of Menstrual Synchrony: Negative Results.” Psychoneuroendocrinology, vol. 16, no. 4, 1991, pp. 353–359. DOI: 10.1016/0306-4530(91)90021-

K.Yang, Zhengwei, and Jeffrey C. Schank. “Women Do Not Synchronize Their Menstrual Cycles.” Human Nature, vol. 17, no. 4, 2006, pp. 433–447. DOI: 10.1007/s12110-006-1005-z.

Kathleen Stern & Martha K. McClintock
“Regulation of ovulation by human pheromones”
Nature, 1998How a 1971 Paper Ignited the Search for Human Pheromones - DongA Science https://share.google/mEGRoQcrdaDnrRryg

Wilson, H. Clyde. “A Critical Review of Menstrual Synchrony Research.” Psychoneuroendocrinology, vol. 17, no. 6, 1992, pp. 565–591. DOI: 10.1016/0306-4530(92)90016-Z.Strassmann, Beverly I. “Menstrual Synchrony Pheromones: Cause for Doubt.” Human Reproduction, vol. 14, no. 3, 1999, pp. 579–580. DOI: 10.1093/humrep/14.3.579.

Schank, Jeffrey C. “Do Human Menstrual-Cycle Pheromones Exist?” Human Nature, vol. 17, no. 4, 2006, pp. 448–470. DOI: 10.1007/s12110-006-1006-y.

What makes a great youth sports coach? Is it about teaching the game, building confidence, winning, or simply helping kids learn to love the sport?

In this episode of Wondering About..., we’re sitting down with our friend Erika Kelly to talk about youth sports coaching and what it really means to coach kids today.

Erika shares her coaching philosophy and what has shaped the way she approaches working with young athletes. We talk about what it means to coach the whole person—not just the athlete. What happens when coaches look beyond performance and pay attention to a child’s confidence, character, relationships, emotions, and development? How can coaches challenge kids while still creating an environment where they feel supported and valued?

We dive into the world of club vs. high school sports, talking about the differences between the two, what each can offer young athletes, and how families navigate the choices and expectations that come with competitive sports.

And, of course, we’re wondering about parents. How involved should parents be? Where is the line between being supportive and putting too much pressure on a young athlete? And how can coaches and parents work together to create a healthier experience for kids?

It’s a conversation about competition, confidence, development, participation, and the adults who have the opportunity to shape a young athlete’s experience.

Because youth sports are about so much more than the scoreboard.

Come wonder with us.

Have you ever wondered how easily you are influenced? 

In this episode of Wondering About…, we’re diving into the fascinating science of influence. We start with a seemingly innocent Tiktok that led us down the rabbit hole of pharmaceutical reps and gifts to the psychology of reciprocity, familiarity, authority, and social proof. We explore the subtle ways other people can shape what we think, what we choose, and what we do.

And here’s the twist: research suggests we’re pretty good at recognizing bias and influence in other people, while being much less likely to recognize it in ourselves.

So are we really as independent-minded as we think we are?

We’re wondering about drug reps, free lunches, advertising, friendships, social media, and all the invisible nudges happening around us every day.

Because maybe the most interesting question isn't “Am I being influenced?”

It’s “Who—or what—is influencing me?”

Aikin, K. J., O’Donoghue, A. C., Miles, S., DelGreco, M., & Burke, P. (2024). Physician interpretation of information about prescription drugs in scientific publications vs. promotional pieces. Research in Social and Administrative Pharmacy, 20(4), 419–431. doi:10.1016/j.sapharm.2024.01.003

Brax, H., Fadlallah, R., Al-Khaled, L., Kahale, L. A., Nas, H., El-Jardali, F., & Akl, E. A. (2017). Association between physicians’ interaction with pharmaceutical companies and their clinical practices: A systematic review and meta-analysis. PLOS ONE, 12(4), e0175493. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0175493

Dana, J., Cain, D. M., & Dawes, R. (2006). What you don't know won't hurt me: Costly (but quiet) exit in dictator games. Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes, 100(2), 193–201. doi:10.1016/j.obhdp.2005.10.001

Fickweiler, F., Fickweiler, W., & Urbach, E. (2017). Interactions between physicians and the pharmaceutical industry generally and sales representatives specifically and their association with physicians’ attitudes and prescribing habits: A systematic review. BMJ Open, 7(9), e016408. doi:10.1136/bmjopen-2017-016408

Milgram, S. (1963). Behavioral study of obedience. The Journal of Abnormal and Social Psychology, 67(4), 371–378. doi:10.1037/h0040525

Mintzes, B., Lexchin, J., Sutherland, J. M., Beaulieu, M.-D., Wilkes, M. S., Durrieu, G., & Reynolds, E. (2013). Pharmaceutical sales representatives and patient safety: A comparative prospective study of information quality in Canada, France and the United States. Journal of General Internal Medicine, 28(10), 1368–1375. doi:10.1007/s11606-013-2411-7

Pronin, E., Lin, D. Y., & Ross, L. (2002). The bias blind spot: Perceptions of bias in self versus others. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 28(3), 369–381. doi:10.1177/0146167202286008

Regan, D. T. (1971). Effects of a favor and liking on compliance. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 7(6), 627–639. doi:10.1016/0022-1031(71)90025-4

Spurling, G. K., Mansfield, P. R., Montgomery, B. D., Lexchin, J., Doust, J., Othman, N., & Vitry, A. I. (2010). Information from pharmaceutical companies and the quality, quantity, and cost of physicians’ prescribing: A systematic review. PLoS Medicine, 7(10), e1000352. doi:10.1371/journal.pmed.1000352

Steinman, M. A., Shlipak, M. G., & McPhee, S. J. (2001). Of principles and pens: Attitudes and practices of medicine housestaff toward pharmaceutical industry promotions. The American Journal of Medicine, 110(7), 551–557. doi:10.1016/S0002-9343(01)00660-X

Zajonc, R. B. (1968). Attitudinal effects of mere exposure. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 9(2, Pt. 2), 1–27. doi:10.1037/h0025848

Have you noticed the beautiful kitchens, homemade bread, flowing dresses, gardens, and slower-paced home life showing up all over social media? Welcome to the world of Tradwives.In this episode of Wondering About, we’re wondering what the Tradwife trend is really all about. What exactly is a Tradwife? Where did the term come from? Why has this lifestyle become so popular online—and what is it about the aesthetic that has so many people fascinated?We dig into the rise of Tradwife influencers, the appeal of homemaking and a slower lifestyle, and the difference between what we see on social media and what everyday life might actually look like behind the perfectly curated posts.Is Tradwife life a return to simpler living? A social media aesthetic? A reaction to our increasingly busy lives? Or a little bit of all three?Pour yourself a cup of coffee, put the sourdough in the oven, and come wonder with us!

Citations:

A single mother speaks out on how the ‘tradwife’ lifestyle led to her divorce - https://www.cnn.com/2024/02/27/health/tradwife-lifestyle-women-mental-health-wellness/index.htmlAll your questions about Nara Smith & Lucky Blue: https://www.elle.com.au/culture/celebrity/nara-smith-lucky-blue-relationship/Mothers’ invisible workload is damaging their mental health https://news.okstate.edu/articles/communications/2019/mothers-invisible-workload-is-damaging-their-mental-healthThe #Tradwife Persona and the Rise of Radicalized Domesticity https://ojs.deakin.edu.au/index.php/ps/article/view/1645Meet the queen of the “Trad wives” (and her eight children). The Sunday Times. https://www.thetimes.com/magazines/the-sunday-times-magazine/article/meet-the-queen-of-the-trad-wives-and-her-eight-children-plfr50cgk

Why are we so fascinated by true crime?

In this episode of Wondering About, we’re going down a rabbit hole to figure out why so many of us are drawn to stories about murder, mystery, danger, and the darker side of human nature.

Is it morbid curiosity? Are we trying to learn how to protect ourselves? Do we like the thrill of being scared from the safety of our own couch? Or are we simply wired to want to understand things that frighten us?

And then there are the people who take it a step further—the “keyboard detectives” who research cases, connect clues, develop theories, and sometimes become determined to help solve a crime.

We’re wondering why true crime has such a hold on us, why women make up such a large part of the audience, and what psychology can tell us about our fascination with the stories we probably shouldn't be listening to right before bed.

It’s a little creepy, a little fascinating, and a whole lot to wonder about.

Come wonder with us.

Notes:

Dru Sjodin case in North Dakota

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Murder_of_Dru_Sjodin

Lindsay Clancy case (still active)

https://www.pbs.org/newshour/nation/trial-of-lindsay-clancy-the-mom-who-killed-her-3-children-enters-second-week-of-testimony

True Crime blog-

https://truecrimenews.com/

Citations:

Vivanco Carlevari, S., Scrivner, C., & Oosterwijk, S. (2025). [Article title]. British Journal of Psychology. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC13353251/Alfaro‐Beracoechea, L. , Puente, A. , Da Costa, S. , Ruvalcaba, N. , & Páez, D. (2018). Effects of fear of crime on subjective well‐being: A meta‐analytic review. European Journal of Psychology Applied to Legal Contexts, 10(2), 89–96. 10.5093/ejpalc2018a9Harrison, M. A. , & Frederick, E. J. (2022). Interested in serial killers? Morbid curiosity in college students. Current Psychology, 41(6), 3768–3777. 10.1007/s12144-020-00896-w

Have you ever wondered why some words are considered “bad” in the first place? Who decided which words we’re not supposed to say—and why does yelling one after stubbing your toe somehow make you feel a little better?

In this episode of Wondering About, we’re wondering about curse words. Where did they come from? Why are certain words considered offensive? Does swearing actually affect our brains and bodies? And why do the words that shock one generation barely get a reaction from the next?

We dig into the history and science behind profanity, find out what research says about people who swear, and—of course—talk about our own relationship with those four-letter words.

So whether you swear like a sailor or still spell out the bad words, this episode is for you.

What the @#$% is it about curse words? Come wonder with us!

Citation:

Jay, T. (2009). The Utility and Ubiquity of Taboo Words. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 4(2), 153–161.Adolphs, R., et al. (1999). A role for the human amygdala in recognizing emotional arousal from unpleasant stimuli.Van Lancker, D. (1987). Nonpropositional speech: Neurolinguistic studies.Does swearing at work get the job done? - Sean Stonefield, NBC News, https://www.nbcnews.com/id/wbna43442410Profanity Can Sometimes Be the Best Medicine, Increasing Pain Tolerance by ~ 33%, Psychiatrist.com, https://www.psychiatrist.com/news/profanity-can-sometimes-be-the-best-medicine-increasing-pain-tolerance-33-percent/