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Your Questions are Your Answers to Your Challenges (Ep. 32)
I feel like a zen master with that title.
We are coming up on the end of the year; the time to be reflective, take stock of what we have accomplished, and plan for all that we hope to accomplish in the coming year. And in order to make this time truly effective, there is one primary area on which we should focus: the questions we are asking.
We don’t think about questions. They just exist - like nouns, verbs and Pauly Shore. When I ask my clients to define what a question is, they give a variety of answers that don’t quite ecompass the purpose of questioning. A question, to define it, is a request for information where you legitimately don’t know the answer.
This year I’ve spoken often about the value of learning and entering situations with a “learning mindset.” It’s not my unique idea; there’s plenty of information out there on it. But, from what I have experienced over the years, there is no better way to get past any challenge that comes my way.
And in order to have a learning mindset, we need to eliminate assumptions. A tall order, for sure, but the way to do that is to ask a good question.
I think back to corporate life and how often people were told to work on “listening skills.” That’s nice, but they are irrelevant if we are not asking the right questions. I think also of all the questions people did ask during meetings or over e-mail, dripping with sarcasm, agenda or snark. These aren’t questions - they are judgmental statements.
We do it in our home life as well. Over time, we create assumptions. Due to the Principle of Least Effort, we know that our brains will take every opportunity to work as lightly as possible. So it jumps over details. Those details become assumptions, and in doing so, we fill the gaps with our own perspective, and that affects how we interact with people.
The questions we are asking ourselves are impactful to our own learning about ourselves. Over the next two weeks I’ll cover the questions to ask yourself to recap your year and to plan for the new year. Your capability, your growth, your levels of accomplishment and happiness and joy and sparkles are all a reflection of the questions you ask yourself.
No judgment, pure curiosity. You’ll be shocked at what you can learn about yourself.
If I can recommend some books on the topic, I’d say the two best on questions that I have read are: Change Your Questions, Change Your Life by Marilee Adams and The Art of the Focused Conversation by The Institute of Cultural Affairs. Happy reading!
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By Jim Frawley, Bellwether
4.5
1111 ratings
I feel like a zen master with that title.
We are coming up on the end of the year; the time to be reflective, take stock of what we have accomplished, and plan for all that we hope to accomplish in the coming year. And in order to make this time truly effective, there is one primary area on which we should focus: the questions we are asking.
We don’t think about questions. They just exist - like nouns, verbs and Pauly Shore. When I ask my clients to define what a question is, they give a variety of answers that don’t quite ecompass the purpose of questioning. A question, to define it, is a request for information where you legitimately don’t know the answer.
This year I’ve spoken often about the value of learning and entering situations with a “learning mindset.” It’s not my unique idea; there’s plenty of information out there on it. But, from what I have experienced over the years, there is no better way to get past any challenge that comes my way.
And in order to have a learning mindset, we need to eliminate assumptions. A tall order, for sure, but the way to do that is to ask a good question.
I think back to corporate life and how often people were told to work on “listening skills.” That’s nice, but they are irrelevant if we are not asking the right questions. I think also of all the questions people did ask during meetings or over e-mail, dripping with sarcasm, agenda or snark. These aren’t questions - they are judgmental statements.
We do it in our home life as well. Over time, we create assumptions. Due to the Principle of Least Effort, we know that our brains will take every opportunity to work as lightly as possible. So it jumps over details. Those details become assumptions, and in doing so, we fill the gaps with our own perspective, and that affects how we interact with people.
The questions we are asking ourselves are impactful to our own learning about ourselves. Over the next two weeks I’ll cover the questions to ask yourself to recap your year and to plan for the new year. Your capability, your growth, your levels of accomplishment and happiness and joy and sparkles are all a reflection of the questions you ask yourself.
No judgment, pure curiosity. You’ll be shocked at what you can learn about yourself.
If I can recommend some books on the topic, I’d say the two best on questions that I have read are: Change Your Questions, Change Your Life by Marilee Adams and The Art of the Focused Conversation by The Institute of Cultural Affairs. Happy reading!