Sisonke: Voices of Reason

002 Communication is Power


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Knowing yourself is important when communicating, if you know yourself, you know what you want then you’ll know what you want and will be able to express yourself better

  • What do you want to say?
  • Why are you saying it, what are you hoping to achieve from saying what you’re saying?
  • How many relationships were ruined because of poor communication?
  • How many times have you been frustrated at work because of communication?
  • How do you communicate to yourself? Do you say good things to yourself? E.g. Affirmations
  • We assume everyone thinks like us and don’t necessary see the need to explain 

    Clear Communication brings a sense of peace. It leads to understanding and healthy relationships 

    We should be able to listen to understand not to respond. Use communication intentionally to get the message across but not to hurt someone else’s feelings

    Be willing to understand what the other person is saying. Often we have arguments because we don’t try to hear the next person but want them to hear us instead. It's important to understand the person you are communicating with so you can adjust the message accordingly.

    Being able to have difficult conversations is important as it allows for things to be ironed out.

    Perspective affects communication because we see things the way we know them which means we also hear what we want to hear. 

    Using communication to deal with the below topics discussed previously:

    Childhood traumas and toxic relationships: Seeing a professional to talk about this and find ways to deal with these issues.

    Love languages - communicating how you interpret love, understanding how the next person recognizes and shows love, respect, apologies, gratitude

    Triggers - communicating your triggers to your loved ones could help them avoid doing or saying anything that could be a trigger to you

    Grief and mourning - when you get to a point in the healing process where you feel like you’re ready, talking about your feelings could help with healing, it could also help the next person as well

    Misconceptions (perceptions) - communicating your thoughts, views an beliefs with others opens up a channel of exchanging ideas but can also clarify confusion or misconceptions. This eliminates anyone making assumptions

    Self love -Setting boundaries is a form of self love. Communicating your boundaries draws the line on what you’re not willing to do

    Expectations and handling disappointment: Communicating what you expect from the next person and also ask if there are any expectations from you, this eliminates assumptions

    Attitude of gratitude: Being able to communicate when you are grateful for certain things, being able to communicate and express gratitude

    Knowing and living your values: sometimes values do not need to be communicated to people you have known for long. Communicating them when starting new relationships so you can be in relationships that align with your values will avoid misunderstanding, personality clashes and conflict

    Friendship, marriage and dating: Communication is the oxygen that keeps these relationships alive, together with other values.

    Be sincere when listening and sharing

    Be short and brief, get to the point or else the next person’s mind starts wandering

    Improve your vocab- sometimes you might have issues with explaining a point because you run out of words in your vocab

    Look at body language and other non verbal cues

    Learn to pick up emotional signals - feelings so you can adjust your message and get it across without any hinderances

    • Be honest & vulnerable
    • Be aware of yourself
    • Be open & respectful
    • Be curious & intentional
    • Create a safe environment
    • ...more
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      Sisonke: Voices of ReasonBy Sisonke Wellness