In this delirious, dawn-cursed episode of The Viktor Wilt Show, our beloved morning gremlin awakens in a fog of instant-coffee tar and residual nightmares, only to immediately hurl listeners into the paranormal chaos gripping Pocatello. Ghost Adventures has descended upon the Yellowstone Hotel like a caffeinated swarm of goth hornets, and Viktor spends the opening minutes vibrating with the energy of a Victorian child who just heard Santa crash through the window. He pivots directly into plotting a viewing party for Lieutenant Crain’s long-awaited Family Feud appearance—a moment he discusses as though Steve Harvey himself is the oracle of fate and possibly the final boss of East Idaho.

From there, Viktor attempts to educate listeners on “scientific myths,” but in practice it becomes a psychological freefall. He roasts the jellyfish-pee myth (insinuating that someone out there has a very suspicious kink), admits birds freak him out because they are “dinosaurs with anxiety,” and spirals into a full betrayal arc about why his childhood textbooks lied about blue blood. He then lurches—without transition—into browsing MSG prices on Amazon like he’s preparing for a sodium black-market deal.

Next, Viktor introduces listeners to Japan’s lowest-rated toy train: a transparent, deranged, EDM-blasting gear-storm that spins like it’s summoning a rave demon. Viktor wants it in his home studio. He says this with sincerity. This is concerning.

Then he gets hyperfixated on the possibility of Mount Rainier exploding. He reassures himself his daughter is probably safe unless the mountain decides to do a casual mud-apocalypse, at which point “whoops.”

Suddenly, he’s back on the warpath about Christmas music—announcing that yesterday’s show titled I Declare Eternal Yuletide Dominance is getting big numbers and reaffirming that he and Josh are officially the Kings of Christmas in East Idaho. He proceeds to drag not one but TWO Brads: Brad Royle (for audio-processing critiques) and Brad Barlow (for suggesting Viktor was being “mean” online). Viktor responds by doubling down on the Yuletide Crown like a man possessed by the Ghost of Christmas Petty.

Then he tells you about a 120-pound python that plummeted through a Malaysian bathroom ceiling, forcing listeners to imagine fatal snake rain while he reminisces about Rexburg’s legendary snake house, where thousands of snakes turned the walls into a biological lava lamp. He is both horrified and delighted.

Thanksgiving drama enters the chat next: a man named Craig—possibly the Antichrist of potlucks—insults the dishes, brings the wrong food, arrives late, complains about the sink, and declares her food inferior. Viktor advises a firm, “No, you’re not coming to Thanksgiving, fool.”

He then tangos with the emerging horror of AI country songs topping Billboard charts for the low, low price of “$3,000 in iTunes purchases,” gently implying that the music industry is a claw machine rigged by goblins.

FREAK NEWS™ follows:
 • Florida woman doing 107 MPH to get pizza (a queen)
 • Illinois man waving a rifle to “attract women” (a cryptid)
 • A UK school banning K-pop demon hunter songs (a prophecy of local Idaho outrage)

Then Viktor conjures AI-generated fake news live on air, resulting in hovering potato rings and 300 paragliding alpacas terrorizing Ammon. It’s somehow less chaotic than the real news he reads.

Suddenly—POW—he saw a ghost in Salt Lake City. A Victorian-looking woman walked rapidly from a parking garage with pale skin and determination, vanished instantly, and convinced Viktor she was undead or at least extremely committed to method acting.

He closes with a woman whose driveway was stolen by a rogue backhoe brigade, mourns the cost of concrete, and begs the universe for the week to end already.