Breaker Whiskey

044 - Forty-Four


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Please visit breakerwhiskey.com for more information or to send a message to Whiskey's radio. Breaker Whiskey is an Atypical Artists production created by Lauren Shippen. If you'd like to support the show, please visit patreon.com/breakerwhiskey. As a patron, you will also receive each week's episodes as one longer episode every Monday.

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[TRANSCRIPT]

[click, static]

Breaker, breaker, this is Whiskey calling out for Birdie.

[click, static]

I got your message.

[click, static]

“Job important. Hurt people.”

I—I’m not sure what to do with that.

Um, you told me that I wasn’t in danger and that you weren’t in danger, but I don’t know if that’s the same as knowing if you’re dangerous or not. I’m not sure knowing the answer to that question is important.

[click, static]

Yeah, I really don’t know what you want me to do with that. If you’re looking for a shoulder to cry on or looking for absolution. If it’s that—if it’s hoping that somebody will absolve you of the hurt you caused or the guilt that you feel then I am not that person.

I guess I could tell you to not feel guilty because I don’t— I don’t think necessarily you should, but then again, what do I know about you or your job?

[click, static]

A lot of people think that their jobs are important and very very few people are right, so I’m not sure how to judge which one of those you are. I think being a doctor is important, healing p eople. But if you feel like you’ve hurt a lot of people as a doctor…I mean a lot of that is out of your hands, right? You don’t strike me as a type of person who would intentionally injure someone.

[click, static]

You know, when I first heard your code broadcasting, I wondered if it was some sort of government system. Some sort of emergency broadcast that had switched on six years ago and never switched off. And maybe you can’t tell me this, but maybe I wasn’t totally off. Government jobs can be important. They can also be useless and corrupt and hurtful. You could’ve hurt a lot of people working for the government. I know that I was hurt by—

[click, static]

Whatever it is—whatever you did, I can tell you not to feel guilty but I’m not sure that you should trust me on that. That’s—that’s what I mean by me not being that—that person. There are things that I should feel guilty for—things that I did, things that I was, things that I still I am I don’t know. And I don’t know that I feel all that guilty about any of it.

[click, static]

That’s not true. I do feel guilty for what Harry and I did. We—we made a choice that day when we started our weird little existence. Before everything happened or maybe simultaneous with everything that happened I mean…like I told you we were a little caught up in our own affairs and, well, we made a choice that day. Clear eyed and maybe not of completely sound mind, but no one could say that we had no other options. And we made a choice and I can’t say with complete certainty that I would go back and make a different choice but that doesn’t mean that I feel so confident about it.

Anyway, if you knew me—really knew me, I don’t—

[click, static]

I don’t think that you would be looking to me to make you feel better about whatever it is that you did. And maybe if I knew what you did, I wouldn’t be trying to get to you, but I guess I’m curious…

Do you feel like you had a choice?

[click, static]

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Breaker WhiskeyBy Atypical Artists

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