Want some $41.99 a pound Rizzo fatty meat on your supper table? Let's get Opening Audio going this morning...A teacher read off some comments his second graders left for him...Pa Pa has a hairy back...A man was popped for a DUI...He had six empty bottles of booze...He had to be taken to the hospital...That is where he shoved a pill bottle up his backside...An emu was causing havoc in the great state of Maine...A woman rattled off a list of people that she does not want at her funeral...As we tried to move on to other things we got caught up in a conversation about Art Linkletter, who was the original host of Kids Say The Darndest Things...Coca-Cola has agreed to use real cane sugar in their soda...Let's just drink Dr. Thunder...Nine people have been charged in connection with a fraud ring that operated in Buncombe County...Ada County Sheriff's Detectives in Idaho are looking for a masked, buttocks slapper...A man arrested for running naked around a West Asheville neighborhood and attempting to break into at least one home has pleaded guilty...What is your favorite beef stick? A ranking came out of the best and you'd be surprised that Slim Jim comes in last place...Who has the sexiest voice in Hollywood? We went through some folks, and you'd be surprised to know that number one on the list is John Goodman...Would you leave your partner for a million dollars? Ozzy Osbourne and Black Sabbath's final show set a new record for the highest-grossing charity concert of all time.  It raised over $190 million...The Men's Underwear Index, popularized by Alan Greenspan, suggests that men's underwear sales can be an indicator of economic downturns...Imagine walking outside and finding your laundry on fire. That's what happened to an Arkansas woman who's now warning about the hazard...If your dad thinks you're a loser, don't worry because we don't...So please check out this Thursday edition of The Rizzo & Jeff Show!!