Make your own ham! ⁠https://thecheekychickpea.com/vegan-ham/

The boys are back for some more ham - in Morham! They enjoy the wheatfields and flies of this tiny East Lothian hamlet ("the smallest (agricultural) parish in Scotland" according to Wikipedia) and tuck in to a homemade ham.

Forgot to mention: this tofu/wheat gluten combo is called seitan. Pronounced like Satan - maybe he brought all the bugs.