Episode 88: My Oxford Year

Welcome back to Oxford (yes, again) where Netflix serves up another ambitious American woman whose carefully planned life gets derailed by British architecture and a charming TA. Sofia Carson plays Anna, a Cornell grad with a Goldman Sachs job she deferred - did we mention Goldman Sachs? Because the movie certainly does, repeatedly - to study Victorian poetry for a year. Her greatest challenge upon arrival? A single flight of stairs. Truly inspirational.

Peak Dumpster Moments:

• Anna's voiceover declaring "everything was going according to plan until it wasn't" as she faces... one flight of stairs with a suitcase
• The ChatGPT-perfect Oxford bucket list written in impeccable handwriting in the middle of her Moleskine notebook - fish and chips listed right alongside the Bodleian Library
• Anna not understanding the chip shop guy asking "haddock or cod?" - a joke that would work better if England spoke a different language
• Netflix's cliché checkbox: the snarky gay neighbor whose first line is insulting her shoes
• The pub that's completely normal until the camera pans to reveal it's actually a drag karaoke bar - "like going to Fridays for bottomless margaritas and finding out it's drag night"
• Jamie refusing to take his shirt off on camera for four months of relationship montage, then finally having a Patrick Duffy-style love scene right before he dies
• The 750th anniversary gala at Oxford looking exactly like a high school prom

The Oxford Cinematic Universe: This episode marks the hosts' third trip to Oxford, following Surprised by Oxford (featuring Rose Reid). They note both films have suspiciously identical shots of campus and wonder how anyone actually attends classes there with all the film crews. Also discovered: Oxford Blues (1984) starring young Rob Lowe - a gender-swapped version where an American guy pursues a woman to Oxford. It's going on the list.

The Hatfield House Deep Dive: Jamie's childhood home is actually Hatfield House, a Grade 1 listed Jacobean estate built in 1611 where Queen Elizabeth I learned she would become queen. The current owner is worth £345 million. There's a controversial £50 annual charge just to walk the grounds.

The Verdict: It's Surprised by Oxford meets The Map That Leads to You - another film where a hot guy with a terminal illness white-fangs the protagonist. The cancer subplot comes out of nowhere, the illness is barely shown convincingly (he's dancing and drinking at galas!), and the ending montage of Anna completing Jamie's dream European tour alone is genuinely devastating - even if Scott was mostly ready for the credits to roll. The library fetish jokes write themselves, and we're apparently not done with Oxford yet.

Coming Up Next: Christmas on the Alpaca Farm - finally available in our region! A woman quits her New York fashion job to make sustainable luxury knits with a single dad alpaca farmer. He's very serious about not using blends. 5.8 on IMDb. 90 minutes of pure Lifetime holiday magic.

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