Johnny may look like your typical union leg-breaker, but underneath all that subcutaneous fat and baldness he's just an old softie, especially when it comes to his beloved 11-year-old niece Tanya. Recently, he was entrusted with two simple jobs: buy Tanya new glasses for no more than $150 and keep boys out of her bedroom. Johnny went 0 for 2 that day and his wife and children have been merciless in their admonishment ever since. Don't worry though, all is fine, except for Johnny's crushed sense of self-worth.