Do Less Parenting

11: When School Becomes Scary, Understanding School Avoidance and What Helps


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When School Becomes Scary, Understanding School Avoidance and What Helps

Robyn talks with fellow therapist Kristen McNeely about school avoidance, unpacking what’s really happening beneath the surface and how parents can help kids return to school with confidence.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman is joined by fellow therapist Kristen McNeely for a meaningful conversation about school avoidance. Together, they explore why some kids start to resist school, how anxiety plays a major role, and what parents can do to help. Rather than seeing school refusal as defiance, Robyn and Kristen explain how avoidance is a form of distress that needs understanding, not punishment.

They discuss the early signs of school avoidance, the difference between a tough morning and a pattern of anxiety, and the common mistakes parents make when trying to fix it. Robyn and Kristen share language parents can use to support their child’s feelings while still encouraging attendance. They also highlight how collaboration with schools can create a consistent, compassionate plan for getting kids back into class.

By the end of this episode, parents will feel more equipped to approach school avoidance with empathy and structure. You’ll learn how to balance validation with clear expectations, helping your child feel capable of facing school again—one small step at a time.

Shared Resources: 

  • Kristen McNeely’s Website
  • Follow Kristen on Instagram @childhood.empowered
  • Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
  • Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
  • Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources
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Do Less ParentingBy Robyn Isman