When School Becomes Scary, Understanding School Avoidance and What Helps

Robyn talks with fellow therapist Kristen McNeely about school avoidance, unpacking what’s really happening beneath the surface and how parents can help kids return to school with confidence.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman is joined by fellow therapist Kristen McNeely for a meaningful conversation about school avoidance. Together, they explore why some kids start to resist school, how anxiety plays a major role, and what parents can do to help. Rather than seeing school refusal as defiance, Robyn and Kristen explain how avoidance is a form of distress that needs understanding, not punishment.

They discuss the early signs of school avoidance, the difference between a tough morning and a pattern of anxiety, and the common mistakes parents make when trying to fix it. Robyn and Kristen share language parents can use to support their child’s feelings while still encouraging attendance. They also highlight how collaboration with schools can create a consistent, compassionate plan for getting kids back into class.

By the end of this episode, parents will feel more equipped to approach school avoidance with empathy and structure. You’ll learn how to balance validation with clear expectations, helping your child feel capable of facing school again—one small step at a time.

Shared Resources: 

• Kristen McNeely’s Website
• Follow Kristen on Instagram @childhood.empowered
• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

When Kids Avoid, How to Support Without Rescuing

Robyn explains why avoidance keeps anxiety strong and how parents can step in with support that encourages coping instead of escape.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman focuses on what happens when children avoid situations that make them anxious. She explains why avoidance feels like relief in the moment but actually makes anxiety stronger over time. Instead of helping kids feel safe, rescuing them from hard moments teaches them that they cannot handle discomfort.

Robyn shares everyday examples of avoidance, from skipping school to avoiding activities or withdrawing from peers. She offers practical strategies parents can use to stay supportive without giving in to avoidance. This includes naming the feeling, validating the struggle, and encouraging small, manageable steps forward.

By the end of this episode, you will know how to recognize avoidance, respond with connection, and help your child move toward independence. You will feel more prepared to step back from rescuing while still showing up as a steady, supportive presence.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

Facing the What Ifs, Helping Kids Build Tolerance for Uncertainty

Robyn explains how to respond when kids get stuck in “what if” questions and shows parents how to build resilience instead of feeding worry.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman talks about one of the most common ways anxiety shows up in children—the endless cycle of “what if” questions. She explains why answering every question with reassurance may calm things in the moment but ultimately gives anxiety more power. Instead of helping kids feel secure, it often keeps them dependent on parents for certainty.

Robyn shares clear examples of how “what if” thinking takes hold and how parents can shift their responses. She offers practical language that validates feelings while gently redirecting kids back to problem-solving and coping skills. She also highlights the importance of helping children learn that uncertainty is safe and something they can handle.

By the end of this episode, you will feel more confident responding to your child’s “what ifs” without getting stuck in the reassurance loop. You will understand how to guide your child toward resilience and independence by teaching them to face uncertainty with support instead of avoidance.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

The Comparison Trap, Why Measuring Against Other Parents Increases Anxiety

Robyn unpacks how comparing yourself to other parents fuels anxiety and keeps you from focusing on what your child truly needs.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman explores the harmful cycle of comparison in parenting. She explains how measuring yourself against other parents can increase anxiety, fuel guilt, and distract you from tuning into your own child’s needs. Instead of bringing clarity, comparison often leaves parents feeling inadequate and children feeling pressured.

Robyn reflects on her own experiences and the stories she hears from parents in her practice. She highlights the subtle ways comparison sneaks into daily life—through social media, school expectations, and conversations with other parents. She also shares strategies to help parents notice when they are slipping into comparison and gently redirect their focus back to connection and support.

By the end of this episode, you will understand why comparison is a trap that does not serve you or your child. You will feel encouraged to step away from measuring yourself against others and instead build confidence in your own parenting choices.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

The Pressure to Be Perfect, How Parental Anxiety Fuels the Cycle

Robyn explores how a parent’s own anxiety and perfectionism can unintentionally increase anxiety in their child.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman takes a closer look at the role parental anxiety plays in children’s struggles. She explains how parents’ pressure to get it right, do it all, or prevent every mistake can unintentionally model fear and reinforce the very cycle they want to break. Instead of creating safety, perfectionism can pass along anxiety and leave children feeling less capable.

Robyn shares her own reflections as both a parent and therapist, offering examples of how this cycle shows up in everyday family life. She gives practical strategies to help parents notice when their own anxiety is leading them to hover or over-correct. She also highlights simple steps parents can take to pause, regulate, and respond differently.

By the end of this episode, you will see how lowering the pressure to be perfect can free both you and your child. You will feel encouraged to shift from control and over-accommodation to connection and support, creating more space for independence and resilience.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

Breaking the Cycle, How to Step Back Without Abandoning Your Child

Robyn shares how parents can reduce accommodations while still staying connected and supportive.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman explores what it looks like to step back from over-accommodating without leaving your child feeling alone. She explains how anxiety often leads parents to jump in quickly, fix problems, or smooth the path, but these well-meaning efforts can keep kids from developing resilience.

Robyn walks through practical ways to reduce accommodations while maintaining warmth and connection. She highlights the importance of small, intentional shifts—pausing before rescuing, reflecting feelings instead of removing challenges, and offering encouragement as children face discomfort. With relatable examples from daily life, she shows how to balance stepping back with staying present.

By the end of this episode, you will feel more equipped to support your child’s independence without fear that you are abandoning them. You will see how doing less creates space for growth, while your consistent presence builds trust and safety.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

When Reassurance Backfires, How to Help Your Child Face Uncertainty

Robyn explains why constant reassurance can actually fuel anxiety and offers practical ways to respond with support instead.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman talks about a common trap many parents fall into—reassuring their children again and again when worries show up. She explains why reassurance feels good in the moment but often strengthens anxiety over time. Instead of helping kids feel secure, it can keep them stuck and searching for certainty that no parent can truly provide.

Robyn shares how to recognize when reassurance has turned into a pattern, and she gives simple examples of what to say and do instead. She walks through small language shifts that validate feelings, encourage coping, and gently point toward independence. By listening, you will learn how to respond in ways that both comfort your child and build their ability to manage uncertainty

By the end of this episode, you will feel more confident stepping back from endless reassurance and more equipped to support your child’s growth. You will see how choosing support over certainty creates space for resilience and independence to develop.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

Support vs Accommodation, How to Help Your Anxious Child Without Feeding the Anxiety

Robyn breaks down the difference between support and accommodation, showing how small shifts in language and response reduce distress and build skills.

In this episode, therapist and mom Robyn Isman explains why the words we use and the actions we take matter when a child is anxious. She defines accommodation as anything we do or avoid doing that lowers distress in the short term but keeps anxiety in charge over time. She then contrasts this with true support, which helps a child face hard moments, feel safe, and practice coping skills.

Robyn shares everyday examples from home and school. She talks about what we say when a child refuses to do something, how we respond when worries spike before an activity, and the ways we can step back while still staying connected. She offers practical language shifts, such as moving from promising certainty to naming the feeling and pointing to the next brave step.

By the end of this episode, you will understand how intentional “doing less” helps create more independence and less anxiety. You will also leave with a simple way to check your own patterns: ask yourself if you are easing distress right now or helping your child build confidence for the future.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

Parenting While Anxious, What That Looks Like and How to Shift It

Robyn explores how your own anxiety impacts your parenting and what you can do to respond with awareness instead of reactivity.

In Episode 3 of Do Less Parenting, Robyn talks about something that shows up in nearly every parenting challenge, anxiety. Specifically, parenting while anxious.

Robyn walks listeners through what it looks like when anxiety drives parenting decisions, from over-researching and second-guessing to racing to fix every problem. She offers language and examples that help parents recognize their own patterns and understand the ripple effect it can have on their children.

This episode is both validating and eye-opening, especially for high-achieving, Type A parents who are trying their best but often feel stuck in cycles of worry and control. Robyn gently shows how doing less begins with noticing what anxiety is doing behind the scenes, and how small shifts in awareness can lead to more independence and confidence for both you and your child.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources

What Are We Actually Supposed to Do Less Of?

Robyn breaks down exactly what she means by “do less,” clearing up misconceptions and guiding parents toward supportive, science-backed shifts.

In Episode 2 of Do Less Parenting, Robyn takes time to clarify something essential, what exactly are we doing that we should do less of? This episode is all about defining the “less” in Do Less Parenting, so that parents aren’t left guessing or, worse, assuming they’re supposed to show up less or love their kids less.

With her signature blend of warmth, clarity, and clinical insight, Robyn outlines the behaviors and patterns that actually increase anxiety in kids and stress in parents. From over-accommodating to stepping in too quickly, she helps listeners recognize what’s getting in the way of their child’s independence and how they can begin to change that.

This is a foundational episode for anyone who wants to support their child’s emotional growth while also honoring their own capacity and wellbeing.

Shared Resources: 

• Follow Robyn on Instagram @parentingtheanxiouschild 
• Parenting the Anxious Child Membership
• Sign up for Robyn’s Newsletter and find additional resources