We are currently in a five-day 'pause' here in Las Vegas due to COVID, but I'm super stoked to be back, and I really hope that you are doing well. Today's I want to talk to you all about rejection - a topic that comes up a lot in my coaching. When we are pursuing big goals, some stuff might just not happen for us, so rejection is a natural part of the process and it's essential to handle it well. It's so important to realize that rejection is something that happens to everybody, so let's dig into it together today.

I start by discussing how people react towards rejection, why some come back stronger, grow, and become better while others suffer from it, and how you should never let rejection hold you back. We'll look at how dealing with rejection in unhealthy ways can negatively impact your personal relationships and even lead to depression and anxiety. I also touch upon the reason why rejection stings, and convey encouragement that it can build character in the long run. We finish up by reviewing the five ways to move through rejection, as well as the importance of mantras and affirming messages.

And, as always, if there is ever a topic you would like me to discuss, a guest you'd like me to interview on the podcast, or feedback you wish to offer, please feel free to contact me at [email protected] - I would love to hear from you!

The Finer Details of This Episode:

• Why some people grow with rejection while others suffer
• The evolutionary reason behind the hurt from rejection
• How attachment styles affect how you respond to rejection
• How people grow stronger with rejection
• There are no good and bad emotions
• Ways to deal with rejection that can help you come out stronger
• The importance of mantras and affirming messages

Quotes

"Rejection is a real part of the process, and it's important to feel prepared for it and to know that it happens to everybody in all forms and in every area of our life."

"When you let rejection hold you back, it can really wreak havoc on a lot of aspects of your personal life."

"Dealing with rejection in unhealthy ways can negatively impact your personal relationships, and it can lead to depression and anxiety."

"Nobody likes to hear this, but the experience of being rejected can actually help in the long run to become more resilient in our life."

"When somebody rejects us, there's a very primal piece to it. It goes against everything that we feel like we need for survival."

"We have to have confidence in our ability to deal with uncomfortable emotions head-on. And it's essential to cope with this type of discomfort or any discomfort in a healthy way."

"Research tells us that if we allow the emotion, if we acknowledge it, name it, allow it to hang out with us for 90 seconds, it begins to diminish. It goes away."

"If you never get rejected, you're probably living very far inside your comfort zone. So we can't be sure we're pushing ourselves to our limits until we get turned down every now and then."

"To move through rejection and come out stronger on the other end, we have to treat ourselves with compassion and self-care. We need to respond to that negative self-talk - that inner bitch - with gentler, kinder, neutral messages."

"We can't make generalizations about ourselves when we get rejected."

"One specific incident cannot define us. One thing, two things can't define us. What they do, though, is they build us. They allow us to grow. It builds character."

"We can't let our worthiness depend on other people's opinions of us and one event define who we are. Just because someone else determines something about you or doesn't accept you or denies you as part of something, it doesn't mean it's true about you."

"If somebody in your life is experiencing rejection, please don't respond to them in the moment with something logical. Not going to help. Later, when they've moved through the emotions, and then they're into that processing place, then you can talk logically."

"Every single successful person has experienced rejection multiple times."

Show Links:

Kelly's homepage - www.kellytravis.net

Social: @kellythealth