12 Week Relationships Podcast

Having children or not is one of the most important decisions a couple has to make. It's a life changing choice and a difference in positions can cause deep rifts, but is calling it quits or conceding the answer? Can the difference be reconcilable? Will I or my partner change over time?

This is a common discussion among couples and one that needs to be handled with careful thought and consideration. To help, Pye and Dr. Glen discuss their perspectives on addressing this conflict and making a sound decision that won't lead down a road of regret.

How do we convey empathy through a digital medium? How can we communicate complex ideas in simple and relatable ways to a broader audience?

Matthias Barker is a therapist and popular content creator on topics around mental health and personal development. Widely known for his viral short-form videos, Matthias has mastered the ability to relay complex messages in a way that viewers of all ages and backgrounds can relate to and understand. Communication is at the center of it all and Pye and Matthias dig a little deeper into how he developed this critical skill through his upbringing and rise into his career as well as how we, ourselves, can become better communicators.

Learn more about Matthias' various mental health workshops:
➜ Workshops: https://matthiasjbarker.com/

Be sure to visit Matthias' podcast as well as his social media channels:
➜ Matthias J. Barker Podcast: https://apple.co/3QVTxVI
➜ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matthiasjbarker/
➜ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@matthiasjbarker
➜ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/MatthiasBarker

We talk a lot about our 12 week programs and how they're designed to help you become your own relationship expert in 12 weeks, hence our name, 12 Week Relationship.

Lately, we've been getting a ton of questions asking what are the programs actually like? What is C.V.F.T.™? What do we actually do over the course of the 12 weeks? In this episode, Pye and Dr. Glen dive into the upcoming 12 Week Life & Relationships Group Coaching program and what you can expect while going through the process.

Enroll early here for the 12 Week Life & Relationships Group Coaching Program!
➜ https://bit.ly/3OMFtfl

A relationship built around trauma can be difficult to spot because they can feel "right" in so many ways. They fulfill deep needs created by past traumas and we tend to mistake that fulfillment for closeness and connection. The bonds and beliefs created by these wounds can be so powerful that they can blind each partner to deep differences in values and interests that would otherwise throw the relationship into question.

Pye and Dr. Glen discuss 5 common signs that a relationship is built around trauma and how these relationships can negatively affect other areas of life if left to continue.

Conflict is stressful and it's easy to get lost in our elevated emotions. Nobody likes feeling attacked or one may be dead set on making their point. Either way, reason can tend to take a back seat and ego take the wheel, unnecessarily fanning the flames and prolonging the conflict.

However, conflict is inevitable and necessary for growth and healthy dialogue is key to finding an effective resolution. To do so, Pye and Dr. Glen walk through 5 commonly made mistakes to avoid during conflict and provide alternative approaches to more productive conversations.

So far in our Roadmap episodes, we've discussed Desire and Quality Time as two key components for what makes a successful relationship and what happens when either are absent. Today, we're going to discuss the final piece of the Stupid-Simple Relationship Method: Sustainability.

Sustainability dictates our emotional cost in maintaining a relationship. When we say a relationship lacks Sustainability, what we’re saying is that the emotional costs are so high that it’s eroding our Desire to continue the relationship. Without Sustainability, we can’t close the loop and continue feeding Desire. We stop wanting the relationship because “it’s just not worth the effort.”

While within Sustainability, we can find the reasons WHY your relationships end, we can also find also the solutions on HOW to keep your relationships healthy.

Today, we're tackling some more of our community-submitted relationship questions.

Our community is important to us! We love hearing your feedback and answering your questions. If you're curious about anything relationship related, you can DM us your questions on Instagram at @12weekrelationships. While we don't offer direct relationship advice, we may select your question for an upcoming Q&A episode. Don't worry, we 100% respect your privacy so we promise your name will remain anonymous.

This is the second part of our latest relationship Q&A so be sure to check out Part 1 (Episode #52)

When relationships grow apart, we often hear people fall back on explanations like "We just got too busy," or "We don't live near each other anymore." But the reality is that the relationship ended because it was nothing more than a casual relationship that was supported by circumstance rather than deliberate choice.

Within these situational relationships, or Situationships, Desire is not a factor because the Quality Time is created by a circumstance such as work or school, and Desire to pursue more never develops. So when the circumstance that created the Situationship is no longer there, the relationship naturally grows apart.

Situationships still provide great value, meaning, and emotional benefit to our lives within the context of the circumstance, so it's important to enjoy them for what they are while taking the time to understand what propels some relationships forward, while others remain at a distance.

Like any relationship dynamic, some level of fighting and disagreements is expected in a family. There are healthy ways to settle disagreements but toss in a bit of dysfunction and things can quickly spin out of control.

For those constantly finding themselves in the middle of family drama, seemingly to no end, Pye and Dr. Glen lay out some real-life examples and tips for diffusing the situation as well as healthier alternatives to approaching sensitive issues with family.

Why is it that most of our acquaintances never turn into friendships? Along the same lines, why do most of our friendships tend to fade over time? What we're getting at here is Desire.

Desire is essentially the "want" for the relationship. The emotional benefits that justify your efforts to create a new relationship or support your choice to spend time with an existing one. Without Desire, friendships and relationships fade away or simply never form.

So what creates Desire and why can it be so fleeting?